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Hope after Vigilante Exposure ?

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FromTheAshes

Member since
January 2025

20 posts

Posted Mon January 20, 2025 9:29pmReport post

My (ex)person was chatting online to a vigilantie decoy. So far what he has admitted is a conversation, sending a d*** pic, asking for pics. And potentially some IIOC on his phone. The extent of these images remain unknown. And maybe more chats, although he says it's just the one.

They posted the sting over Facebook and within days everyone in his life knew. Family. Friends. His work.

Everyone has blocked him. Work have sacked him. He now basically hides at a flat he has managed to secure.

Does anyone else have experience with this? Is there hope for him to have some form of life? His life is no longer with us or his children- at least until we know the extent of what his phone contains. And then we can start weaving him back into some form of fatherhood, if appropriate.

But I don't wish him an empty existence.

Gosh this is conflicting.

Love him. Hate him. Piss off. Give him a chance of redemption?

Sending light as always x

Dragonmama

Member since
November 2022

256 posts

Posted Mon January 20, 2025 10:09pmReport post

I have lots of experience of this, if you want please feel free to message me

Caggie164

Member since
October 2023

278 posts

Posted Tue January 21, 2025 11:21amReport post

From the ashes

Apart from the ILOC this could be my story. I worry what the future holds especially if it goes in the press, if or when it goes to court. He's still on pre charge bail and awaiting the next step.

It was a Facebook vigilante sting too but luckily not at the house. Weirdly though the group who orchestrated this has now changed their group on Facebook and Instagram to private so you have to join to see any footage. Not that I want to see anything but I was just doing a Google search of my persons name to see what came up and nothing did. Whereas in the past it did. I found this strange but I'm also glad.

We're no longer together but I still have feelings for him and we are in contact x

Poppop

Member since
September 2023

73 posts

Posted Tue January 21, 2025 11:28amReport post

Hi ashes

My son was caught by viglantes, talking to a decoy,he sent rude pictures and ask them

It was also steamed all over Facebook, he removed himself from Facebook straight away

He lost job,friends and some family, house,and a uncertain future with his wife



He got 2 yrs suspended sentence

100 hrs community service now complete

10 yrs shipo and sor

It was in papers,luckily no pictures

FromTheAshes

Member since
January 2025

20 posts

Posted Tue January 21, 2025 12:34pmReport post

Thank you for your replies.

Poppop. How is your son now? Does he have a job, new friends? I hope he has found some peace?

Is 10yrs on the SOR and SHPO fairly common for his offences?

Sorry for the question bombardment x

Caggie164

Member since
October 2023

278 posts

Posted Tue January 21, 2025 1:14pmReport post

My person found a new job. Totally different direction to previous job and has set himself up as self-employed. Luckily he has a small work pension that covers most of his bills that takes away some money worries.

FromTheAshes

Member since
January 2025

20 posts

Posted Tue January 21, 2025 2:22pmReport post

That's great he has managed to find work and cover his bills. I really think purpose in life is one of the small steps to not reoffending or worse.

Poppop

Member since
September 2023

73 posts

Posted Tue January 21, 2025 4:14pmReport post

He managed to find a little job,no question ask

But it's here and there

He got one friend, that stopped by him

At the moment is living with my parents and wife with here's

They do meet up

But as the future I don't no,as his wife moving up north with family, and he may be going up later

I am not sure if 10 yrs is normal

The judge said he was very lucky he did not go to jail

I think pleading guilty straight away helped

He also got autsim

He just takes one day at time

He low risk

Ocean

Member since
September 2023

820 posts

Posted Tue January 21, 2025 9:34pmReport post

My son felt he'd never be able to leave the house again after his story was published online and in the local paper, his marriage ended, he lost his job, home, family life and best friend.

He received a 2 year suspend sentence, 300 hours community service, a fine, 10 years SHPO and SOR.

16 months after sentencing, he takes his children out (with supervision), goes shopping, has made a couple of new friends, plays football and has a small part time job. He smiles and laughs, he sings along to music and is content with a much simpler life.