Conscience
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Hi All
You're the ones who know how I'm feeling, so I'm coming to you for some advice please. Our knock was 16 months ago now, he got a suspended sentence and time on the register for viewing images over a period of years. I knew nothing. We have a young family and no money or support from family, so I'm trying to be practical for the sake of the kids and we still live as a family (though no longer as husband or wife). It feels like it's been brutal, it went to press so he lost his job and we're struggling to make ends meet. If I ask him to leave he will be homeless and our children will be devastated. However, I'm struggling. I was abused as a child and am mentally torturing myself for letting him stay. He has done Inform and I know he regrets what he has done, but it's me that's paying for it. I feel like I'm caught between a rock and a hard place. Any help or advice would be gratefully appreciated I still find it hard to sleep at night because I feel it looks to the outside world that I'm condoning what he's done. I just want to run, but won't leave my children.
You're the ones who know how I'm feeling, so I'm coming to you for some advice please. Our knock was 16 months ago now, he got a suspended sentence and time on the register for viewing images over a period of years. I knew nothing. We have a young family and no money or support from family, so I'm trying to be practical for the sake of the kids and we still live as a family (though no longer as husband or wife). It feels like it's been brutal, it went to press so he lost his job and we're struggling to make ends meet. If I ask him to leave he will be homeless and our children will be devastated. However, I'm struggling. I was abused as a child and am mentally torturing myself for letting him stay. He has done Inform and I know he regrets what he has done, but it's me that's paying for it. I feel like I'm caught between a rock and a hard place. Any help or advice would be gratefully appreciated I still find it hard to sleep at night because I feel it looks to the outside world that I'm condoning what he's done. I just want to run, but won't leave my children.
Hi Crystal, I am so sorry for your situation. It is never easy to choose and I hope you can get some help to prioritise and decide what to do. Stay strong. Have you tried counselling?
Thank you Cynthia-Veronica. Unfortunately, as we now have no income I can't afford counselling, and am not eligible for anything via GP. I am staying strong for our children, but just want to be away from this hideous situation. As I know only too well the feeling of violation, it haunts me to know he watched it. Hopefully time will be the healer, meantime, thanks for reaching out, it means such a lot.
Thanks Poster
I have, you're right. The helpline are brilliant and put me in touch with some organisations to help me deal with my childhood experiences. It's probably all amplified at the moment because of Christmas, which will be fine, and I know in time this will all heal, it's the same as anything, sometimes it feels massive and this is one of those moments. Thank you, knowing I'm not alone helps.
I have, you're right. The helpline are brilliant and put me in touch with some organisations to help me deal with my childhood experiences. It's probably all amplified at the moment because of Christmas, which will be fine, and I know in time this will all heal, it's the same as anything, sometimes it feels massive and this is one of those moments. Thank you, knowing I'm not alone helps.