Impending doom
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Today has been awful. More so than usual. I have an overwhelming sense of impending doom. I can hardly breath. I can't even explain it.
I honestly don't know how we will get through this. It's too much. How are we supposed to just carry on? How is this situation a thing? I honestly feel completely blindsided all over again.
I cannot see a way forward, I just can't.
I honestly don't know how we will get through this. It's too much. How are we supposed to just carry on? How is this situation a thing? I honestly feel completely blindsided all over again.
I cannot see a way forward, I just can't.
I've been completely crushed by it today. Something in the air :( what stage are you at? We're 8 months in and waiting on forensics. It's hell.
3 months ish. It's just a living nightmare isnt it? I just can't find any relief or anything to hold onto. It's all terrifying and bleak.
I hope there's a parallel universe somewhere and we're all living very pleasant lives in it. That's all I've got. That's it. Childish fairy tales.
I hope there's a parallel universe somewhere and we're all living very pleasant lives in it. That's all I've got. That's it. Childish fairy tales.
I understand that completely. I can't process what's happened to me. I feel like I'm in a snow globe that's been picked up and shaken and I don't recognise my life anymore. The person I thought knew is someone completely different. I'm in shock, heavily medicated and can get sucked right back to day 1 at the smallest trigger. But I am having more better days since about November / December, so you will find that things get easier too. I promise xx
How can people be treated this way still waiting for forensics after 8 months it's disgusting why is no one doing anything about it. It's causes pain to the whole family. My children's childhoods are passing them by while we are waiting.
Just keep going. You just get used to it. Police didn't bring charges for my person until 4 years after the knock, still waiting on sentencing.
I could of written this!!
Some days I just have passing thoughts and other days it completely consumes me, yesterday was my day everything was completely doom and gloom, today is much better.
We are nearly 7 months in and have had one voluntary interview in November and are still currently waiting for CPS to present charges, as much as I'm dreading the day we receive these I am also trying to embrace them so we can then try settling into our new normal life.
My person is my son he is not allow to return home and has been loving with a family member since the knock, it has completely ruined us x x
Some days I just have passing thoughts and other days it completely consumes me, yesterday was my day everything was completely doom and gloom, today is much better.
We are nearly 7 months in and have had one voluntary interview in November and are still currently waiting for CPS to present charges, as much as I'm dreading the day we receive these I am also trying to embrace them so we can then try settling into our new normal life.
My person is my son he is not allow to return home and has been loving with a family member since the knock, it has completely ruined us x x
I'd love to bring good news, but unfortunately I can't. I'm 2 years post knock on valentines day funnily enough. That's a day that'll never be the same again. And I still have days like this now amd we're past sentencing and things. But some days the overwhelming sense of loneliness, and fear of it happening again, just a trigger that's like a 'wow that really happened' .. and I'm right back there.
What I will say though is your good days get better, and you get stronger to fight and for myself and the bad days, aren't as bad (for the most part) we just have to keep going, one way or another.
What I will say though is your good days get better, and you get stronger to fight and for myself and the bad days, aren't as bad (for the most part) we just have to keep going, one way or another.
I wish I knew.
Thank you everyone. I can't say today has been any easier. Just different.
I feel exhausted and numb.
A little cat came over to me as I put the bins out this morning, never seen it before but it was really friendly. Animals are just wonderful aren't they? That was a really nice start to the day (if you ignore the bins)
I dread the weekends - so I'm going to try and have a plan. I don't know what yet but I can't face another weekend full of despair
Hope you've all made it through the day ok x
I feel exhausted and numb.
A little cat came over to me as I put the bins out this morning, never seen it before but it was really friendly. Animals are just wonderful aren't they? That was a really nice start to the day (if you ignore the bins)
I dread the weekends - so I'm going to try and have a plan. I don't know what yet but I can't face another weekend full of despair
Hope you've all made it through the day ok x
I am so sorry that you have had to join us here, but it is a safe place for us all. Both the helpline & this forum keep us going. Each day is a new day to be treated as such. We cannot change what has happened but we must look after ourselves.
Try to spot some good each day- it is there.
Try to spot some good each day- it is there.