Advice
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I'm wondering if any of you lovely lot could help out a stressed out mama.....
I'm here due to my son.... we are expecting his case to be presented to CPS any day now.... what we know so far... his devices found approx 40 images/videos of iioc (very young age bracket) across all categories, prohibited images and extreme pornography, now I'm prepared to do LFF inform course and I'd like him to be showing police/solicitor/judge that he is doing proactive stuff to make sure this doesn't happen again but what he is struggling with is that these images were all 'within files of bulk downloads' 'not searched for' and 'one sent via Snapchat, randomly!' I honestly get what he is saying but I just want the best possible outcome for him he has said he will do course for me but he doesn't feel they are going to be of any use to him, we are actively seeking porn addiction therapy but again he says he isn't addicted to it but rather likes the increasing numbers in his files.... for reference he has over 80,000 on devices and not even 1/4 has been viewed!!
Any advice welcome.
I'm here due to my son.... we are expecting his case to be presented to CPS any day now.... what we know so far... his devices found approx 40 images/videos of iioc (very young age bracket) across all categories, prohibited images and extreme pornography, now I'm prepared to do LFF inform course and I'd like him to be showing police/solicitor/judge that he is doing proactive stuff to make sure this doesn't happen again but what he is struggling with is that these images were all 'within files of bulk downloads' 'not searched for' and 'one sent via Snapchat, randomly!' I honestly get what he is saying but I just want the best possible outcome for him he has said he will do course for me but he doesn't feel they are going to be of any use to him, we are actively seeking porn addiction therapy but again he says he isn't addicted to it but rather likes the increasing numbers in his files.... for reference he has over 80,000 on devices and not even 1/4 has been viewed!!
Any advice welcome.
Hello mummy-to-lots
I am so sorry you find yourself here. I agree with you that it would be in your son's best interests to engage in the Inform course that Stop it now run. The course will help him in so many ways, including the dangers of the internet which has led him to this.
I am just wondering if there are they any mitigating factors in your son's case? For example, is he neurodiverse or suffering with his mental health in any way? Both of these may also be playing a role in him not wanting to engage with Stop it Now, possibly?
I am pleased you are going to do the course, it will provide you with knowledge and support.
I hope my response this has helped in someway and I hope other members of the forum respond with futher ideas/advice.
Take care of yourself, the best you can in the circumstances.
I am so sorry you find yourself here. I agree with you that it would be in your son's best interests to engage in the Inform course that Stop it now run. The course will help him in so many ways, including the dangers of the internet which has led him to this.
I am just wondering if there are they any mitigating factors in your son's case? For example, is he neurodiverse or suffering with his mental health in any way? Both of these may also be playing a role in him not wanting to engage with Stop it Now, possibly?
I am pleased you are going to do the course, it will provide you with knowledge and support.
I hope my response this has helped in someway and I hope other members of the forum respond with futher ideas/advice.
Take care of yourself, the best you can in the circumstances.
Knee jerk reaction for me was to ask oh to do a course attend a class I didn't know what but I wanted him to be proactive, for me he went to s.a.a but it didn't help him he said it was just full of men self pitying themselves and most continued to view porn regular, my oh was a link downloaded through kik he was seeking normal porn, as soon as the link came out he deleted app everything and never revisited it, his biggest mistake was not reporting to the police so we got the knock, they found 5 images 2 cat a and 3 cat b in a cache file which was only retrievable by an expert, the shock of the knock has meant my oh has never revisited any sort of porn at all
Thank you guys,
Definitely going to push him into this direction, even if he will only be doing it for me!
He is very high functioning autistic and sees everything back and white as in I've not done this so what good is the course going to be, his mental health is stable and he isn't outright refusing but worries that by doing these courses he is in by some way admitting he was at fault, I'm inclined (at the moment) to agree that he is getting the same treatment/punishment as people that has actively looked for this stuff. None the less he know that because it was on HIS computer and in HIS possession he must admit guilt.
Such a sucky world right now, this type of crime must be hitting catastrophic numbers as 'anyone' of us can be sent these type of things its very concerning.
X x
Definitely going to push him into this direction, even if he will only be doing it for me!
He is very high functioning autistic and sees everything back and white as in I've not done this so what good is the course going to be, his mental health is stable and he isn't outright refusing but worries that by doing these courses he is in by some way admitting he was at fault, I'm inclined (at the moment) to agree that he is getting the same treatment/punishment as people that has actively looked for this stuff. None the less he know that because it was on HIS computer and in HIS possession he must admit guilt.
Such a sucky world right now, this type of crime must be hitting catastrophic numbers as 'anyone' of us can be sent these type of things its very concerning.
X x
People don't realise they should report themselves to police. My husband reported a server and thinks he may have basically caused the knock from this.
Seems your damed if you do and damed if you don't with regards to self reporting, from the sounds of it alot still end up getting arrested, devices seized, charged and prosecuted.
Hello mummy-to-lots
Thanks for your reply that your son has high functioning Autism. The reason I asked if he was nuerodiverse was when you said he had a high number of files. Sometimes people of the spectrum like to collect lots of whatever they are interested in, for example when younger lots of lego sets, trading cards etc . I just think if this applies to your son that it is explained as a mitigating factor as he has collected lots of files on his computer.
Clare Allely, a professor of forensic psychology, explains the vulnerabilities of people on the spectrum and it may be useful to look at her work on the internet around this.
I am thinking of you and your son.
Take care of yourself.
Thanks for your reply that your son has high functioning Autism. The reason I asked if he was nuerodiverse was when you said he had a high number of files. Sometimes people of the spectrum like to collect lots of whatever they are interested in, for example when younger lots of lego sets, trading cards etc . I just think if this applies to your son that it is explained as a mitigating factor as he has collected lots of files on his computer.
Clare Allely, a professor of forensic psychology, explains the vulnerabilities of people on the spectrum and it may be useful to look at her work on the internet around this.
I am thinking of you and your son.
Take care of yourself.
Alison - YES!! This is the words I was looking for.... a collector!! Police have confirmed that way under a 1/4 of his files has been opened (not sure if or how many were iioc) and are considering enhanced scan of devices but unfortunately it will not change the outcome of this. X x
Hi Mummy-to-lots
Just thought if you put 'Allely' in the search bar at the top of this page you will find all the posts on this forum relating to Clare Allely that may be worth you looking through.
Just thought if you put 'Allely' in the search bar at the top of this page you will find all the posts on this forum relating to Clare Allely that may be worth you looking through.