Family and Friends Forum

I'm sorry you're here. Its absolutely horrendous. Its just over 2 weeks since The Knock, so all i can offer is what's helping me. Take one day at a time. Some days will be worse than others, some better than others. When youre having a good day, don't feel guilty about it. I'm lucky that I have my best friend to talk to, a busy job to distract me, and me and my person are talking more openly than we ever have done. Well, he is, because he has to be if he's going to get through this with me supporting him. I think the talking is helping me more than anything, as it's helping me to understand how he got to this. Be kind to yourself, feel all the feelings, don't fight them and bottle them up. They need to come out. If I get overwhelmed I'll lie down and do some breathing exercises, or go for a walk. Do nice things for yourself. Tell as few people as possible. You don't need to worry about their judgement as well as everything else. I've also accepted that this is going to take months to get to court, possibly 2 years. Call the helpline - i did that the day after and the lady I spoke to helped so much. Consider going on the Inform course. I'm on the list and can't wait. Xx

Oh that's just awful, I'm so sorry. X

Winnie07, this time round (second knock, the idiot reoffended) it's taken 3 years. He was due to be sentenced a few weeks ago but it was adjourned the night before. So now it's on 5/3. I'm terrified of the press again.

Winnie you have my utmost empathy as we too have been waiting 3 years and it's nearly a year since second interview. Silence......

What amazes me is that there are quite a few people that have been waiting longer than us! It's absolutely disgusting how we are treated, just down to incompetence in the police and CPS.
Look after yourself X

Winnie, My son is autistic and we are 1.5 years since crown court. I hear you, I survived most of the time we were going through it. If you need anyone to chat too, please feel free to reach out. sending you lots of love and strengh

Empathy and a hug sent to everyone posting here and those in the same boat waiting. There are far too many of us. Re the complaining - we are going to make a strong point at some stage that although we appreciate the long delays in the justice system at the moment it's just as much (maybe more) the untruths and ignoring we receive from the OIC. We call ours the Officer not really in charge, as to date any requests for an update have been either ignored or we've been told anything to make it sound like things are progressing and to shut us up - and then more waiting...... our grandchildrens' SW is also trying to find out for us and she is receiving the same treatment despite being on the 'same side' as the police. Needless to say it's making her very frustrated and annoyed as it's prolonging the emotional toll on all of us and especially for our grandchildren which is farcical when you consider that the OIC is meant to be working to protect children. My OH and myself have both got significant health problems which are classsed as potentially being caused or triggered by stress and I honestly think that it's as much the treatment by the police as from our son's offences - inflicted on us, the totally innocent ones