They found out
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Hello everyone. I experienced "The Knock" in September, and it has been up and down with my partner since then. I chose to stay because I still love him. We have a child together who adores his dad, and he has done a lot to make amends and is getting help.
The case made it into the newspaper with vague details, mentioning 16 downloaded animated images. So, no one could guess who it was about, even though we live in a small community where everyone knows everyone.
However, it turns out that someone gossiped to my mom—who knows about the situation. She received a call from a friend who had heard from her son that the person in the newspaper was my partner.
How did you others handle it when everyone found out?
For now, I'm going to act like nothing's wrong until I can gather my thoughts. But I am beside myself. I don't know what to do.
I'm so scared for my child's future and having this hanging over us every time we step out the door and meet other people—birthdays and other social gatherings. What if someone does figure out that it is my partner?
How on earth do you explain why you chose to stay?
The case made it into the newspaper with vague details, mentioning 16 downloaded animated images. So, no one could guess who it was about, even though we live in a small community where everyone knows everyone.
However, it turns out that someone gossiped to my mom—who knows about the situation. She received a call from a friend who had heard from her son that the person in the newspaper was my partner.
How did you others handle it when everyone found out?
For now, I'm going to act like nothing's wrong until I can gather my thoughts. But I am beside myself. I don't know what to do.
I'm so scared for my child's future and having this hanging over us every time we step out the door and meet other people—birthdays and other social gatherings. What if someone does figure out that it is my partner?
How on earth do you explain why you chose to stay?
Thank you LittleRobin3.
I remember reading your story from before and I feel for your family. How are you holding up now?
I remember reading your story from before and I feel for your family. How are you holding up now?
My entire town found out 2 days after "the knock" it was devastating as i did not have time to even process it myself. I received alot of support from some in town reaching out and making sure i get out. Coaches of my children even helped me getting rides for my boys to and from sports. I am 3 months in and I do still feel uncomfortable at school pickup or school events bc i am unsure what people are thinking. I just keep reminding myself my kids need me to keep showing up and trying to keep their life as normal as possible. It is incredibly difficult but i was lucky for some supportive people reaching out and helping. I left my husband but he still comes to visit our children. I am not sure what the reaction would be if he came around any of the school activities as i am not sure what extent people know things. We did get news yesterday he will be serving some jail time so once he is sentenced i am not sure what the reactions will be. It truly is the worst part of this having to go through something so awful in such a public way.
i am sorry you are going through this. Sending hugs to you
i am sorry you are going through this. Sending hugs to you
It's horrible! We went to ground for a couple of days. My sons story was twisted, made him out to be a predatory p word, facts were correct but no rounding off of the actual circumstances. I was mortified.
My advice would be to jump on that surf board and bravely ride that tidal wave. People are fickle and every minute a new story/event happens for them to move on to, it will and does eventually settle.
My immediate friends and neighbours were brilliant showing unwavering support. Otherwise - thankfully - no aggression was shown.
Honest my lovely (yes, it bloody hurts) but it will die down eventually xxxx
My advice would be to jump on that surf board and bravely ride that tidal wave. People are fickle and every minute a new story/event happens for them to move on to, it will and does eventually settle.
My immediate friends and neighbours were brilliant showing unwavering support. Otherwise - thankfully - no aggression was shown.
Honest my lovely (yes, it bloody hurts) but it will die down eventually xxxx
My story hit the local press and social media twice - front page news. I did read all the comments but straight away some friends reached out to me. I had my house attacked and I was burgled as a direct result of the media attention. I was attacked online by people I thought were my friends. It was the worst period in all this - was at my lowest and thinking about taking my own life.
Fast forward almost 3 years and I'm in a completely different place - and single.
I am quite open why my marriage ended and I still wrongly assume everyone knows. But they don't. I've recently started going out with a chap I've known for about 5 years and we have a lot of mutual friends. After a few weeks he asked me why my marriage had ended. He had no idea but to be fair he isn't the sort to listen to gossip.
It's old news now. There have been more local cases reported and each time I think about the poor families involved
Fast forward almost 3 years and I'm in a completely different place - and single.
I am quite open why my marriage ended and I still wrongly assume everyone knows. But they don't. I've recently started going out with a chap I've known for about 5 years and we have a lot of mutual friends. After a few weeks he asked me why my marriage had ended. He had no idea but to be fair he isn't the sort to listen to gossip.
It's old news now. There have been more local cases reported and each time I think about the poor families involved