Cruelty of CJS
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Hi lovelies, so sentencing was meant to be tomorrow. My OH has been cancelling all his subscriptions, packing prison bag, bagging up his worldly belongings in case the worst happened. Having last minute prep calls with solicitor, police protection officer, work union rep etc. I spent half an hour with my head under a cushion trying to process! We were out this afternoon shopping for last minute prison clothes and getting cash out - and we get the call from the solicitor ...it's been adjourned AGAIN! I know this seems to be quite common from reading others experiences, but the cruelty is simply mind blowing! A new date has been set for 27 March so I need to try get back to work again, I can't be off indefinitely! My head is spinning xxx
I'm so sorry. My partners case was postponed twice very last minute. It was Covid restrictions at the time so video links were blamed but I feel like it's an all too common occurrence. Thinking of you both xxx
I am so sorry Eye of the Storm, that is properly sh!t.
I am in disbelief how the CJS functions. Yesterday I read that the guy that climbed Big Ben with a Palestinian flag at the weekend has already been to magistrates court and is due in crown next week. I mean you literally cant make it up, can you?
At least you dont have to wait too long until the next date, but that's no consolation I know. X
I am in disbelief how the CJS functions. Yesterday I read that the guy that climbed Big Ben with a Palestinian flag at the weekend has already been to magistrates court and is due in crown next week. I mean you literally cant make it up, can you?
At least you dont have to wait too long until the next date, but that's no consolation I know. X
My ex's sentencing court hearing at crown court has been adjourned the evening before THREE TIMES so far. I'm at my wits end. X
Jesus that's terrible honestly they don't give a shit about people's lives x
It's so cruel and wrong and unfair. I wish we could complain. I'm so sorry for you and all the other women and families whose lives are being torn apart as we just have to sit and wait, powerless and shamed into silence.
Hi everyone, thank you for the outpouring of love and support. There are literally no words to explain how important you all are to me. Only those that experience this nightmare could have any idea what it's like.
Yesterday I took an awful call from my Dad, who is hot headed at the best of times but basically had a massive rant - said he was angry with me, accused me of being a bad mother and not putting my kids first, I go through life lurching from one disaster to another, it's my OHs stress not mine so why am I off sick, he assumed once the sentencing had been postponed on Tuesday that I'd be back at work yesterday, so what is actually wrong with me! I could lose my job(s) then what, what's my plan, will I get depressed and then what, I'm old enough to know what I'm doing - but do I ....I could go on! He did text after to apologise, but wow, it hurt. If my parents were actually communicating with me and allowing me the space to explain what's going on behind the scenes and all the things I'm putting in place to protect the kids! SS even agreed a family day out in the community on Sunday with sentencing due this weekend, so the 4 of us had a brilliant day together, so much so the kids want to do something again this weekend - although SW not confirmed that's ok yet.
I try so hard to live my life not judging anyone or sticking my nose in on other peoples business - but he's made me feel like a bad person, a rubbish daughter, a rubbish mum - and I feel like a rubbish gf because I'm standing by my OH as best as I can, but my kids have to come first and that's making me question and second guessing everything I'm doing.
I do have to go back to work really, I can't stay off indefinitely. Especially if it gets to 27th and they postpone again! Now I need to ring the doctors and see if they'll relinquish my sick note so I can go back and just try work through the next few weeks. I don't know if I'm coming or going.
Had a good conversation with my eldest's school yesterday with the child welfare officer, who was gorgeous and supportive, no judgement. Said they'd had another case similar at the school and they'd supported the student and there had been no backlash. So that fills me with a bit more confidence. she even said the fear of something is always worse than the reality. Need to pass her my Dads number!
Inform starts on Monday, looking forward to that. Called the helpline a couple of times. Reaching out you lovely lot every time I need you. Thank you xxxxx
Yesterday I took an awful call from my Dad, who is hot headed at the best of times but basically had a massive rant - said he was angry with me, accused me of being a bad mother and not putting my kids first, I go through life lurching from one disaster to another, it's my OHs stress not mine so why am I off sick, he assumed once the sentencing had been postponed on Tuesday that I'd be back at work yesterday, so what is actually wrong with me! I could lose my job(s) then what, what's my plan, will I get depressed and then what, I'm old enough to know what I'm doing - but do I ....I could go on! He did text after to apologise, but wow, it hurt. If my parents were actually communicating with me and allowing me the space to explain what's going on behind the scenes and all the things I'm putting in place to protect the kids! SS even agreed a family day out in the community on Sunday with sentencing due this weekend, so the 4 of us had a brilliant day together, so much so the kids want to do something again this weekend - although SW not confirmed that's ok yet.
I try so hard to live my life not judging anyone or sticking my nose in on other peoples business - but he's made me feel like a bad person, a rubbish daughter, a rubbish mum - and I feel like a rubbish gf because I'm standing by my OH as best as I can, but my kids have to come first and that's making me question and second guessing everything I'm doing.
I do have to go back to work really, I can't stay off indefinitely. Especially if it gets to 27th and they postpone again! Now I need to ring the doctors and see if they'll relinquish my sick note so I can go back and just try work through the next few weeks. I don't know if I'm coming or going.
Had a good conversation with my eldest's school yesterday with the child welfare officer, who was gorgeous and supportive, no judgement. Said they'd had another case similar at the school and they'd supported the student and there had been no backlash. So that fills me with a bit more confidence. she even said the fear of something is always worse than the reality. Need to pass her my Dads number!
Inform starts on Monday, looking forward to that. Called the helpline a couple of times. Reaching out you lovely lot every time I need you. Thank you xxxxx
You are absolutely tough stuff. Don't let your dad derail what you're doing and how well you're doing it. If there were medals for mental strength and endurance us ladies would be taking gold every day for what we go through, whilst demonstrating love and compassion to others.
Depending on your job, work may be a welcome distraction or one too many stresses. Does your boss have your back? I think if you can do a bit between now and sentencing it'll break up the wait. How about phased / reduced hours?
Depending on your job, work may be a welcome distraction or one too many stresses. Does your boss have your back? I think if you can do a bit between now and sentencing it'll break up the wait. How about phased / reduced hours?
Hi lovely, I managed to go back on Friday and it was okay. I work 4 days a week so I'll be there again this week. The support around me at work is truly incredible, so I'm super grateful for that!
Had a brilliant day out with my OH and the kids today, we're allowed days out in public spaces so went cave exploring at a cove and to the arcades. The 4 of us laughing and enjoying all being together, precious moments. I have no idea when things will ease up contact wise but firstly we need sentencing out the way. So sad to think of the life we could have had together versus the one we've ended up with, but hey ho!
peace and love and hope your coming week goes as well as it can xxxx
Had a brilliant day out with my OH and the kids today, we're allowed days out in public spaces so went cave exploring at a cove and to the arcades. The 4 of us laughing and enjoying all being together, precious moments. I have no idea when things will ease up contact wise but firstly we need sentencing out the way. So sad to think of the life we could have had together versus the one we've ended up with, but hey ho!
peace and love and hope your coming week goes as well as it can xxxx