Sentencing today
Notifications OFF
No idea where to turn.
My adult son didn't want me to go to court, so he went in alone. The Probation Service Report recommended community service; his barrister said as the max was 2 years he could get suspended.
After hours of waiting in various coffee shops I got the call I was dreading.
18 months immediate custodial.
I've driven home shaking like a leaf and am sick with worry for him.
He had nothing with him except the clothes he was wearing; all his medication is in his house.
The logistics are beyond me, no idea where to turn.
My adult son didn't want me to go to court, so he went in alone. The Probation Service Report recommended community service; his barrister said as the max was 2 years he could get suspended.
After hours of waiting in various coffee shops I got the call I was dreading.
18 months immediate custodial.
I've driven home shaking like a leaf and am sick with worry for him.
He had nothing with him except the clothes he was wearing; all his medication is in his house.
The logistics are beyond me, no idea where to turn.
I'm so sad for you I can completely understand how you feel, I went through a similar thing recently with my son. The grief you must be feeling is heartbreaking. I felt so alone and broken there is so much pain attached to this. My son was arrested for a careless breach of his SRO as he deleted an app which wasn't related to any charges. He spent 5 weeks on remand. It was a living hell I felt like I was incarcerated with him. He is on bail now awaiting sentencing next month so we will go through this all again then. I dread it. If you want any advice about the prison system I am happy to help where I can as it was impossible to get help and advice. My son was in a vulnerable persons wing so I am sure your son will be the same. Feel free to to message me, I feel your pain it is so raw xx
I'm so sorry. This is a very similar situation to my partner. Probation recommended a community order and he was sentenced to 2 years custodial. He also had little with him and was very unprepared. It is an incredible and hurtful shock.
Your son will likely go to the local category B prison linked to the courts. He should get a call to tell you exactly where he is today or certainly in the next 24-48 hours. Once he arrives, he will be placed in 'reception' - this includes completion of lots of paperwork. He will be given prison issued clothes, usually a tshirt, grey joggers and jumper and black pumps. Presumably you will be listed as NOK in which case you are entitled to a 'reception visit' in the first week or so. Once reception is completed, he will be moved to an induction wing where he will be based for the first week or 2 and this is where he will be assessed in terms of needs and risk etc. He may then be moved to a different prison once induction is over and this may be a lower category prison. My partner was moved to a category c prison closer to home.
The most important information you need for him is the prison he is in, and his prison number which is formatted like this: A1234AA.
With his prison number you will be able to add money to his account that he will need in order to buy credit to call. All phone numbers must be approved before they are added to his 'PIN' which he needs to use to make calls. You may receive a call from prison to confirm you want to take his calls. Be prepared that this process can take weeks! He will also need money to buy himself snacks etc... from what is referred to as 'canteen' which is essentially how they can order extras. You can add money to his account through a government website but you'll definitely need his prison number.
Depending on whether he is in a private prison or a public prison, you may be able to book visits directly or he may need to book them for you (the latter is more likely in private prisons). Usually they get 4 social visits every month and people visiting must also be approved before they can visit. This is a different process to approving people for phonecalls and can also take weeks. If in a public prison, you can book visits through a government website also. But again as NOK you can ask for a reception visit.
Most prisons allow a limited amount of own clothes in the first 28 days so as soon as you know what prison he is in, contact the prison to ask how you can get his clothes to him.
Feel free to send me a private message if you have any questions etc.. It is a real shock but it soon becomes part of daily routine. Sadly.
xx
Your son will likely go to the local category B prison linked to the courts. He should get a call to tell you exactly where he is today or certainly in the next 24-48 hours. Once he arrives, he will be placed in 'reception' - this includes completion of lots of paperwork. He will be given prison issued clothes, usually a tshirt, grey joggers and jumper and black pumps. Presumably you will be listed as NOK in which case you are entitled to a 'reception visit' in the first week or so. Once reception is completed, he will be moved to an induction wing where he will be based for the first week or 2 and this is where he will be assessed in terms of needs and risk etc. He may then be moved to a different prison once induction is over and this may be a lower category prison. My partner was moved to a category c prison closer to home.
The most important information you need for him is the prison he is in, and his prison number which is formatted like this: A1234AA.
With his prison number you will be able to add money to his account that he will need in order to buy credit to call. All phone numbers must be approved before they are added to his 'PIN' which he needs to use to make calls. You may receive a call from prison to confirm you want to take his calls. Be prepared that this process can take weeks! He will also need money to buy himself snacks etc... from what is referred to as 'canteen' which is essentially how they can order extras. You can add money to his account through a government website but you'll definitely need his prison number.
Depending on whether he is in a private prison or a public prison, you may be able to book visits directly or he may need to book them for you (the latter is more likely in private prisons). Usually they get 4 social visits every month and people visiting must also be approved before they can visit. This is a different process to approving people for phonecalls and can also take weeks. If in a public prison, you can book visits through a government website also. But again as NOK you can ask for a reception visit.
Most prisons allow a limited amount of own clothes in the first 28 days so as soon as you know what prison he is in, contact the prison to ask how you can get his clothes to him.
Feel free to send me a private message if you have any questions etc.. It is a real shock but it soon becomes part of daily routine. Sadly.
xx
Hi, I'm so sorry. My person was sent to prison for 3 years, first offence for IIOC. I know how you feel. X
Hi robin
first offence? How bad was it?
first offence? How bad was it?
i'm sorry to hear the outcome of your sentencing hearing, it must be a massive shock if you were only expecting a community order.
I think LoveActually has given a really through explanation of what to expect in the next few days and weeks, if you need any more information though the following websites might help
Unlock.org
Doingtime.co.uk
Prisonersfamilies.org
My OH did 15 months for his previous offence and said that although its a scary and alien enviroment initially majority of people adapt to it suprisingly quickly.
As others have said feel free to message if you have any questions and i'll try to help answer them.
I think LoveActually has given a really through explanation of what to expect in the next few days and weeks, if you need any more information though the following websites might help
Unlock.org
Doingtime.co.uk
Prisonersfamilies.org
My OH did 15 months for his previous offence and said that although its a scary and alien enviroment initially majority of people adapt to it suprisingly quickly.
As others have said feel free to message if you have any questions and i'll try to help answer them.
3littlebirds x
I am so sorry your son was given a custodial a huge shock for you all
Please please know that as hard as this is your Son will be looked after
My son is currently in prison so please feel free to message me and I can offer as much advice and support as I can
Please make sure you look after yourself despite all the anxiety you are feeling currently
Huge hugs xx
I am so sorry your son was given a custodial a huge shock for you all
Please please know that as hard as this is your Son will be looked after
My son is currently in prison so please feel free to message me and I can offer as much advice and support as I can
Please make sure you look after yourself despite all the anxiety you are feeling currently
Huge hugs xx
@suziesweet
It doesn't have to be bad to go to prison for a first offence. My husband got 44 months after his guilty plea education for sexual communication with a single minor who said she was almost 14 but turned out to be 12. The sentencing for under 13 is far more servere for under 13 and he unfortunately got a very harsh female judge who didn't care about his mitigations (ASD, going to SAA, having psychotherapy for sex addiction, completing Lucy faithful course, terminally father he was caring for, ASD son about to sit GCSEs).
The whole thing appears random. For example, there was a trial recently of a woman who killed and buried her baby that got a suspended sentence as the judge was sympathetic to her mental illness at the time. Not saying her getting suspended was wrong, just that so much of it comes down to the judge.
It doesn't have to be bad to go to prison for a first offence. My husband got 44 months after his guilty plea education for sexual communication with a single minor who said she was almost 14 but turned out to be 12. The sentencing for under 13 is far more servere for under 13 and he unfortunately got a very harsh female judge who didn't care about his mitigations (ASD, going to SAA, having psychotherapy for sex addiction, completing Lucy faithful course, terminally father he was caring for, ASD son about to sit GCSEs).
The whole thing appears random. For example, there was a trial recently of a woman who killed and buried her baby that got a suspended sentence as the judge was sympathetic to her mental illness at the time. Not saying her getting suspended was wrong, just that so much of it comes down to the judge.
Thanks everyone
I had to get away at the weekend, it was all too much, and the process is obviously strange.
But thanks for your responses.
Love Actually, I got a phone call from the prison on Friday morning confirming I was ok to receive calls etc.
I've spoken to him and have his number, which was all much quicker than I expected.
And he's applied for a visit (as it's a managed prison) so apparently they tell me when I can visit. Which will be complicated in terms of logistics, but hopefully better once he susses the system out.
I had to get away at the weekend, it was all too much, and the process is obviously strange.
But thanks for your responses.
Love Actually, I got a phone call from the prison on Friday morning confirming I was ok to receive calls etc.
I've spoken to him and have his number, which was all much quicker than I expected.
And he's applied for a visit (as it's a managed prison) so apparently they tell me when I can visit. Which will be complicated in terms of logistics, but hopefully better once he susses the system out.
Suziesweet
How bad was what? Prison? Awful. His offences were "making" indecent images mainly grade c, some grade b and a handful of grade a that were downloaded in a bundle but weren't opened but he was still charged with the grade a.
How bad was what? Prison? Awful. His offences were "making" indecent images mainly grade c, some grade b and a handful of grade a that were downloaded in a bundle but weren't opened but he was still charged with the grade a.