Family and Friends Forum

Hi Aerial

I am sorry you find youself here.

I am just thinking that the young people inform course that Stop it Now run maybe beneficial for him. As well as covering the dangers of the internet they would help your son understand why this has happened.

It may be worth you ringing the helpline and see how they can support you and your son.

Hi Aerial

Can I ask does your son have a diagnosis of alexithymia (emotional blindness) alongside his ASD? It is a relativly common co-morbidity to ASD. If so it would give a clear medical reason for what as you say could be interpreted by the judge as a complete lack of remorse should it come to that.

Hi, while my son was arrested at 19 and not autistic we did provide endless reports to support him with mitigation. These included a number from when he was younger that were compiled by CAMHS, GP's and educational psychologists that confirmed his behaviours were always that of someone much younger. We supplied his full extensive dyslexic report that on analysis showed so much more than what people consider when hearing a person is dyslexic.



My son entered a plea of guilty, having originally attended court with a not guilty plea.



The character references supported him and we ensured we got across who he was.

My son lacks emotional intelligence and would never have displayed remorse in a police interview regarding his arrest, however would have been no different had they told him he had won the lottery!

My son has lived the past three years, and while it tore holes in our little family at times he is doing everything he can to move on. We have spoke little about anything regarding the matter and i accept that. Again he's not a person of many words but he knows his actions were wrong and how it could have been so very different.



take care xx

Hi, you can literally ask anyone for a "character" reference as long as the person knows your son well, obviously and has done for some time. The courts understand that everyone acts differently in any given scenario. Although a lack of remorse might be noted, it can't be used for sentencing because it's down to interpretation, therefore unreliable. Before sentencing, given your sons ASD, Probation will be asked to do a pre sentencing report for the court. This report will look at everything such as your sons background, education, family, relationships, health, caring responsibilities etc. Probation also include what they think the sentencing should be although the Judge doesn't have to follow this on the day. So, what I'm saying is that you should have plenty of opportunity to explain your sons personality etc, but make sure you ask your solicitor for a pre sentencing report to be done because they don't always do it, but they do usually. Regarding sentencing itself, you're a long way off that. These cases can take years. It's a long road to travel. Sentencing is complex and depends on many factors such as what grade the images are A/B/C, how distressed the children appear, whether there are any moving images, whether someone persuades a child into sending indecent images and many other things. Some do go to prison for a first offence, my ex did, but it's not that common. Prepare for the worst, hope for the best. Wishing you and your family all the very best. X

Lucy Faithful run various courses. One is called INFORM and is for the family members who find themselves thrown into this process. Its done via zoom weekly and goes into all the different aspects of living and navigating post knock including the judicial system, Social Services, the court process etc. You might find it useful. You can email, use the live chat or ring the helpline to ask for a place. X

Hi, myself as mum, my parents and my sons girlfriend. His sibling didn't and we asked no one else. The one thing to remember regarding the references is that anyone writing one must detail their name, relationship to the individual and confirm they are aware of all charges. I don't believe you need many and at one stage we were happy to simply have mine.

Good luck xx