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A great new topic/ where we are at

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Beachdalmation

Member since
September 2024

17 posts

Hi all

LFF have always been amazing.
my fiancé offended before our relationship started- however we have known each other over 20 years.
he is currently on month 4 of 11 months inside and then will spend 11 months on licence.
The prison side has been hard work. They didnt give him his essential medication for a month and I had to do everything to make them give it to him.
communication is good he phones every day and I have been visiting every week (5hour round trip!!!)

we live together in a house he owns. We pay 50/50 bills. We have 5 children combined- him 2 and me 3. My 3 live primarily with their dad (my ex husband) due to work circumstances and him being unable to claim benefits without them. However. Probation are saying my fiance cant come home/ i will be homeless due to me having my children every other weekend. I will not be having them at home when he comes home. Every question is being asked by social services down to who pays the bills and why am i living here.

i feel so frustrated. So hopeless. We have a solicitor but hes a chocolate teapot and I am never involved with probation conversations.
I will have to move out of our home if it means he cant come home otherwise but our life together os one of the only things keeping him and I goingx

i guess. I just need support. Or help. Or anything. I feel hopeless.

Posted Sat April 5, 2025 3:33pmReport post

Tryingtobebrave

Member since
July 2024

25 posts

Hi,

My understanding is that he won't be able to live where children live at first and possibly for a long time after until SS are happy for him to be in the same house after their assessments. Could you or him move in with family until all the necessary assessments have been completed?

Posted Thu April 10, 2025 7:47amReport post

Upset mother

Member since
March 2025

57 posts

I just wanted to share my experience with you. SS have been an absolute nightmare. My OH committed an online offence in August 23, he got a non custodial sentence and is on probation until September. There were no images involved, no SOR or SHPO, my daughter has been put on a CPP since August last year and they will not let him live at the house. Just prepare yourself that you will be in this for the long haul. Get yourself a family law solicitor if your current solicitor is not one x

Posted Thu April 10, 2025 1:47pmReport post

Beachdalmation

Member since
September 2024

17 posts

To be clear my children do not live at our home.
when it is my weekend with them and my fiance comes home I will have my time With them elsewhere.
SS and everyone else have been hell since we got together. To be very clear i have known him for over 20 years and we have been open and honest with police and ss since we got together.

Posted Wed April 16, 2025 7:53amReport post

Tryingtobebrave

Member since
July 2024

25 posts

Have you got another place you can stay with your children when you see them?

Posted Wed April 16, 2025 8:02amReport post

Beachdalmation

Member since
September 2024

17 posts

Ye we have another place to stay with the kids.

there is zero chance of contact

Posted Wed April 16, 2025 9:00pmReport post

Tryingtobebrave

Member since
July 2024

25 posts

If you set out your plans for SS and show that you understand the risks and that you have other accommodation to stay at whilst with your children then they may agree to that plan going forward and hopefully a plan is in place before his release.

Posted Thu April 17, 2025 8:25amReport post

Beachdalmation

Member since
September 2024

17 posts

So far they arent believing me.

they also want to send him to an AP for 3 months. 4 hours away from his whole support system

Posted Fri April 18, 2025 9:59amReport post

Beachdalmation

Member since
September 2024

17 posts

Just wanted to add mentally I am really struggling with replaying the court day. Having him in the dock. So scared. And not even being able to say goodbye.
Inhave horrific nightmares.

Posted Sat April 19, 2025 10:45pmReport post

Quick exit