Family and Friends Forum

Starr

Member since
December 2024

120 posts

I haven't slept properly in months.

I struggle to get to sleep. Then I wake up at 4.30am on the dot. Then I lie awake feeling anxious, awful, and dreading the day ahead until it's time to get up.

But the last few weeks I've been waking at 2.30am. I am beyond tired.

Has anyone tried sleeping tablets? I know my poor sleep is making everything harder. I do have a GP appt booked (thanks everyone who kept suggesting it) but it's not for a few weeks. Wondering if the GP will give me anything? I've tried kalms, sleep tea, calming sounds. Nothing helps.its my mind on overdrive.

I also have horrible nightmares (always had pretty bad nightmares, but they're on a different level these days)- I often wake up distressed, and dripping with sweat so I'm quite anxious about falling asleep too, but I'm averaging 2-3 hours a night and I'm just SO tired. I desperately need some more sleep. I feel nauseous, light headed, and just weird - its like being jet lagged. Since shingles, I've had a succession of niggly viruses - a sore throat, a giant cold sore (never had one before!), a full body rash, another sore throat etc etc and I'm sure lack of sleep isn't helping.

I'm wondering if a few nights of sleeping pills might really help

Posted Sat April 12, 2025 10:33pmReport post

Lifeisover

Member since
January 2025

131 posts

What about something like propranolol for anxiety you can take it as needed and it's calming but doesn't seem to be addictive in anyway. I have just taken occasionally when things get really bad but it might help. apparently it causes insomnia in some people but it def helps me.

Posted Sat April 12, 2025 10:37pm
Edited Sat April 12, 2025 10:39pmReport post

Starr

Member since
December 2024

120 posts

Ooh, I'll read up on it. Thanks!

I'm happy to try anything - even short term just to try and catch up a bit

Posted Sat April 12, 2025 11:01pmReport post

Bondi

Member since
December 2023

82 posts

I tried so much, I couldn't get to gp for personal reasons, but I actually found taking a dose of magnesium really helped me sleep for slightly longer periods which gradually helped. Worked pretty quickly.

Just over the counter dose, might be worth a try while you wait on gp for something stronger!

Posted Sat April 12, 2025 11:23pmReport post

Ocean

Member since
September 2023

921 posts

I have always struggled with insomnia and have in the past used Phenergan which you can buy over the counter to help me sleep. I now have prescribed medication but still keep phenergan in my cupboard just in case.

Posted Sat April 12, 2025 11:25pmReport post

Upset mother

Member since
March 2025

51 posts

I went through this when my OH was arrested and SS were involved. Think it's a cortisol issue. It's all about managing stress to help regulate your body. Do you feel like you are in fight or flight mode all the time?

Posted Sun April 13, 2025 12:19amReport post

Lrf

Member since
July 2024

105 posts

Ive been having awful nightmares my therapist suggested the below, it's like re landscaping the nightmare:

Practice relaxation, pleasant imagery, and coping skills first, to be sure

you are ready to work on changing your nightmares.

Do progressive relaxation, paced breathing, and/or Wise Mind exercises;

listen to music or guided imagery; review the distress tolerance crisis survival

skills.

2. Choose a recurring nightmare you would like to work on.

This will be your target nightmare. Select a nightmare you can manage now.

Put off trauma nightmares until you are ready to work with them—or, if you

target a trauma nightmare, skip Step 3.

3. Write down your target nightmare.

Include sensory descriptions (sights, smells, sounds, tastes, etc.). Also

include any thoughts, feelings, and assumptions about yourself during the

dream.

4. Choose a changed outcome for the nightmare.

The change should occur BEFORE anything traumatic or bad happens to you

or others in the nightmare. Essentially, you want to come up with a change

that will prevent the bad outcome of the usual nightmare from occurring. Write

an ending that will give you a sense of peace when you wake up.

Note: Changes in the nightmare can be very unusual and out of the ordinary

(e.g., you might become a person with superhuman powers who is able

to escape to safety or fight off attackers). Changed outcomes can include

changed thoughts, feelings, or assumptions about yourself.

5. Write down the full nightmare with the changes.

6. REHEARSE and RELAX each night before going to sleep.

Rehearse the changed nightmare by visualizing the entire dream with the

changes each night, before practicing relaxation techniques.

7. REHEARSE and RELAX during the day.

Visualize the entire dream with the change, and practice relaxation as often as possible during the day.

Posted Sun April 13, 2025 7:44amReport post

LisaMargeMaggie

Member since
July 2024

184 posts

Mirtazapine saved my sleep - I can't fight it no matter how frantic I feel. It's also taken the edge off my heightened state (I'm on the maximum dose of sertraline - it wasn't helping my hysteria, but keeps the low level seething under control a bit).
I'd dearly love to come off mirtazapine due to the weight gain but, after 7 months on it, I accept I can't come off it til the case is over and I've safely delivered myself and the children to 'the other side'.

Posted Sun April 13, 2025 8:30amReport post

LittleRobin3

Member since
April 2024

652 posts

Yes, I take Zopliclone because I have severe pain at night making sleep difficult. They work very well. They only allow people to take 3 or 4 per week or they prescribe a short course of 2/3 weeks. There are other meds you could look into such as Melatonin or Amitripyline. Wishing you all the best. X

Posted Sun April 13, 2025 9:21amReport post

lostinthewoods

Member since
September 2024

115 posts

I was really against sleeping tablets so my surgery prescribed an antihistamene which makes you drowsy - Promethazine Hydrochloride. I don't take it all the time as I don't always have trouble sleeping - but if I've had a few bad nights on the trot I'll take one to help me get at least one decent night. They do make me very groggy when I first wake tho, so I try not to take them if Ihave work the next day. The groggy feeling soon wears off once I'm up and about though. X

Posted Sun April 13, 2025 12:03pmReport post

rainyday52

Member since
April 2023

529 posts

My GP will only ever prescribe a strip of 7 sleeping tablets and as the dose is 1 or 2 and 1 isn't quite enough they last for a few days. I even debated ordering online from somewhere probably dodgy but thankfully resisted and now I'm glad i didn't as a friend of my daughters did that and it didn't end well. I've always managed with OTC things but lately need something far more like a sledge hammer! Also any drowsy inducing antihistamine eg Nytol now give me restless legs (it's a common side effect) so I wake up with that making them redundant. I've spent a small fortune on herbal remedies, Apps on my phone, you name it I've tried it BUT I recently bought a 3 type magnesium supplement and can hardly believe it but they seem to be helping as my sleep is much deeper and I wake up far less each night. I do have the odd night when they don't work but I'm having a few days every weeek when I don't feeel like death not even warmed up!

Posted Sun April 13, 2025 1:06pm
Edited Sun April 13, 2025 1:07pmReport post

Sad&Scared

Member since
January 2024

140 posts

I would second exploring propranolol. It's been really helpful to me.

I've always had issues with insomnia so really sympathise. GPs are very reticent about prescribing 'proper' sleeping tablets, IIRC because they are very habit forming. I cut out caffeine altogether when managing my anxiety at the start of all this and was amazed how much difference it made. Also it's worth just ploughing on with all the boring standard sleep hygiene advice (no screens in the bedroom, just reading in bed before sleep, plenty of exercise during the day). I'm sorry there isn't any quick fix though - I know how draining it is.

Posted Sun April 13, 2025 1:24pmReport post

Webb89

Member since
July 2022

516 posts

I was told to take night nurse as that can make you drowsy. I did not try it though as I am on other medication and was too scared to mix them. I am on mirtazapine but this does not make me drowsy. At the beginning when i could not sleep i set up a play list of my favourite songs that were calming. Ie not heavy metal or lots of high beats. I know some people use classicial music but i am not a fan of that. Anyway, i listen to the same playlist every night. It trains the brain to know when it is time to sleep. This took a while though but did help, as at one time i was awake when the sunrised, then sunset and then sunrised again! Not good for coping at all!!!! I know screen time is bad, but i play spider before i go to sleep. The swishing noise my ipad makes when the cards moves helps me relax. So i play a game when i get into bed, put my music on and mostly this helps me go to sleep. Unfortunately it is a bit of trail and error getting what works for you to work.

Posted Sun April 13, 2025 2:24pmReport post

sadso

Member since
December 2023

125 posts

sleeping pills are good bit they hang on me the next day i buy sleep and from boots that what they are called on the packet (sleep aid) get the 50mg ones u buy them over thr counter they help me a lot sometimes I take 2 , but I do get a sleep and stay asleep with them xx

Posted Sun April 13, 2025 3:45pmReport post

Poppet

Member since
February 2025

99 posts

I second magnesium. I started taking it before I went to bed to help with perimeno sleep issues. I was told that magnesium glycinate is the one for sleep, but it did nothing for me. I now take one from a brand called Fit Vit. Its more than a 100% daily recommended dose one. I'm not sure it'll will help with heightened states of anxiety thought to be honest. When all this first happened first me I had to take zopliclone .

Posted Sun April 13, 2025 6:25pmReport post

PrairieMom

Member since
May 2024

116 posts

I go to sleep listening to podcasts. One of my favorites is called "nothing much happens, bedtime stories to help you sleep". Once I'm asleep I'm okay. So I don't have any advice for that. Good luck!

Posted Sun April 13, 2025 9:03pmReport post

Starr

Member since
December 2024

120 posts

Thank you all so much for all your helpful replies!

I've printed off the nightmare plan and I've ordered some msgnesium and phenergan.

Silence really doesn't help so I need to come up with a playlist. I can't remember any music I really like. Maybe after some sleep it will come to me!

I also have a list of medication options I will ask my GP about. I can't go on like this. Someone mentioned fight or flight - yes! I'm permanently in that state - I'm sure that's why I can't sleep, it doesn't feel safe enough to sleep so it's like my brain is just refusing to allow me to sleep, beyond the absolute minimum. I think that explains the nightmares too - to keep me slightly alert/ in fight or flight.

Brain: 'Ok. You can sleep a little bit, but it's a hard no on the relaxation front, I'm afraid. Best I can do is a two hour spine chilling showcase of your worst fears, and most painful regrets. Or you can opt out and lie awake all night with nothing but your biggest fears for company. Your choice. Either way, you'll feel dreadful tomorrow. Goodnight.'

You're all so wonderful - thank you!

Posted Sun April 13, 2025 9:07pmReport post

Upset mother

Member since
March 2025

51 posts

It was me who mentioned flight or flight, apologies not sure of your back story but have you done CBT? I did a self referral with NHS talking therapies, they were really good, they also referred me for a mindfulness course. One comment that helped me was the handout they posted to me- don't let your thoughts rule your body. Just because it's a thought doesn't mean it's real. Focus on being present. That really struck a cord with me.



My body being in constant fight or flight made me really ill. Look after yourself and do anything to relax your body to activate your parasympathetic system xx

Posted Sun April 13, 2025 10:38pmReport post

Webb89

Member since
July 2022

516 posts

I got most of the music i listen to after listening to Virgin radio chilled. It is acoustic versions of songs so are more mellow. I have spotify so when i hear a song i like, i just add it to my sleep playlist. Just a thought. Xx

Posted Sun April 13, 2025 11:12pmReport post

Holdingthegrenade

Member since
June 2024

197 posts

I've always had vivid dreams but like you since this started the nightmares anxiety and restlessness hits badly (usually after a social services visit or an update from the OIC). I wake up every hour from about 2-3am. Sometimes I have nightmares sometimes I dream that I'm back in my old life and I wake up and realise the nightmare is still there when i wake up.

I've got a calming pillow spray, some lavender oil in a stick to rub on my wrists, magnesium supplements and bath salts but I find the best things to to go for a long walk and blow off some steam (with one of my support people). It doesn't stop the nightmares but it wipes me out enough to sleep through them.

im hoping once im through the other side and my person has been sentenced I can start to move on, get some therapy and get past it. Its all the waiting, unknown and uncertainty that's keeping my mind wound up and anxious.

Posted Wed April 16, 2025 7:50pmReport post

Loveactually

Member since
February 2025

41 posts

I second mirtazapine. I have tried promethazine (phernegan) but this made me sleepy all day long, zopiclone, promezine and magnesium didn't do anything for me. I already did a lot of the nighttime rituals recommended and listen to white noise/meditations. Mirtazapine however has worked wonders. It is an anti depressant but in low doses acts as a sedative. It does however make me absolutely ravenous so if you're watching your weight, maybe that's one to avoid. Good luck on finding something that works for you x

Posted Thu April 17, 2025 7:07amReport post

LisaMargeMaggie

Member since
July 2024

184 posts

My sister's elderly cat has been prescribed Mirtazapine to boost its appetite. If I needed evidence that I need to let go of blaming myself for my weight gain, there it is. It literally makes you eat.
It's so odd that the low dose helps with sleep and makes you hungry, but higher doses do other things instead. Medicines are weird.

Posted Thu April 17, 2025 10:56amReport post

Bub84

Member since
January 2024

130 posts

I was having problems sleeping but then I started taking natural melatonin tablets every night which I order online. My kids also have them as since their dad hasn't been allowed to sleep at our family home, they also struggle to sleep and the melatonin works for them too. I don't like taking medications, even to the point of not taking a paracetamol but with the melatonin being a natural medication I'm happy to take it. Let me know if you would like the website that I order ours from xx

Posted Thu April 17, 2025 11:30amReport post

LittleRobin3

Member since
April 2024

652 posts

Look up Autogenics. It used to be available on the NHS. Its progressive muscle relaxation. It takes 3 months to learn but once you have, you've got it for life and it can be used in any situation. Its a really simple process that you repeat a few minutes a couple of times a day. You don't need to think about it at all, just do it. X

Posted Thu April 17, 2025 2:16pmReport post

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