Family and Friends Forum

Preparing for when family members start having children

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majestictopaz15

Member since
December 2019

371 posts

Posted Wed January 8, 2020 9:58pmReport post

Hi everyone, this is my first post (and doubt it will be my last).

My partner got the knock in June 2017, this was before I met him. In Jan 2018 we started dating and within a month he told me about he was facing charges for viewing and distributing sexual content involving children and being on chat rooms on the dark web.

It was a shock but I listened to what he had to say and he was remorseful and had shown mebegun he was getting support through Lucy faithful etc.

He has since been given a suspended sentence and community service and on the register for 10 years. We are trying to get on with our lives and only his friends and family are aware of the circumstances. But I have not said anything to my family and friends, but they know something is up since he hasn't seen his kids in years (he is trying to get access through supervised visitation).



I would like to think I don't need to tell any family members if possible. But there will come a time when family members and friends begin to have children. I would like advice to plan ahead on how to go about this. How best should I approach the topic with family? One also tricky aspect is my friendship circle includes family members so my friendships are at risk too.

Any words of advice would be be much appreciated.

SallyBlue

Member since
March 2019

252 posts

Posted Sun January 12, 2020 12:01pmReport post

This can be tricky, it depends on any conditions he has. Some can say approval is needed before contact with under 18s unless in an unavoidable situation such as at a supermarket. Some may say permission is needed or that the parents must know of his registration. If it is the conditions of the register only then he needs to let the police know if any contact over 12 hours. It could be worth asking his OMU/social work/risk management x

Lucy from Stop it Now!

Member since
September 2018

496 posts

Posted Thu January 16, 2020 11:53amReport post

Dear all,It is positive to see that this forum is being used as a place to receive practical advice and emotional support.We have removed a post from this page as it appeared to be from an individual who has been involved in an online offence themselves. As this forum has been designed for family members and friends of those involved in online sexual offences towards children, we encourage individuals that have been involved or allegedly involved in these offences themselves to call the Stop it Now! helpline on 0808 1000 900 where you will be able to receive the most appropriate advice possibleThanks,

Lucy