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Horizon course

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Louise49

Member since
January 2021

501 posts

Hi everyone, haven't been here for a while but it was the one year anniversary the other day of my partners sentencing ( he was originally arrested the start of 2021 so yeah took along time!). He got a suspended sentence, unpaid work which he's finished, 10 year sor and SHPO and the horizon course, he's about to start the course in a few weeks. My question is has anyone's partner done the horizon course and what are the benefits or actually what's the point of doing it 4 years after arrest. I stayed with my partner and although it was horrendous and the last four years changed my life we have come through it all ok, no media, no prison and apart from probation visits life is fine we have rebuilt our lives and have communicated throughout it all . I'm finding it

hard to see why he needs to do the course. He works full time, has no social issues, has hobbies, we have a good relationship including intimacy. I don't really know anything about horizon but the stuff I've found on Google talks about coping mechanisms etc which he has no issues with. He stopped looking at any porn the day of the knock and hasnt done since. Sorry for the ramble!

Posted Tue April 15, 2025 10:56am
Edited Tue April 15, 2025 10:57amReport post

Distressed and pregnant

Member since
November 2020

1166 posts

Hi,

my partner has done the horizon course and found it very useful. It can be done around work, there are courses run at different times. For my partner he found that it helped him with the shame side of things which I've learned is a huge factor in how they view themselves. He only started it in his last year of probation so it was three years post offending for him. He also stopped watching porn as soon as he was arrested. My advice to your OH would be to go into it with an open mind xxx

Posted Tue April 15, 2025 11:10amReport post

Louise49

Member since
January 2021

501 posts

Cheers Distressed, yeah he'll have an open mind for sure. I just think it would of been more a benefit to go straight after the knock. We weren't in a financial position at the time to pay for private therapy and I think basically we've worked through it all ( with alot of rants from me!) on our own. I think the turning point came after he was sentenced, he didn't get custodial which was one of my fears but also no media which was my biggest fear even more so than prison!. I dunno maybe when he starts it I'll feel differently. Maybe aswell it's giving me a few flashbacks to the knock. I had pushed it out of my mind a bit and we had finally started to rebuild our lives. It's been the most horrific time and I don't know how I managed to get through it but here we are!

Posted Tue April 15, 2025 11:29amReport post

Saint Jude

Member since
January 2025

17 posts

Hi Louise49,

So encouraging to read that you are out the other side and that you and partner are together and ok. Where we get the strength from God only knows but somehow we get through a day at a time. I too have wondered about the horizon course, my OH is only 6 months post knock, but I wonder why it is done so late after sentencing etc.

Good luck and all the best to you as you and your partner move forward with the rest of your lives. Xx

Posted Tue April 15, 2025 12:37pmReport post

Louise49

Member since
January 2021

501 posts

Thanks saint, yeah it feels good to sort of be out the other side, well I don't have the crippling anxiety waiting for court. I do however have other issues, drink too much ( I'm working on that!) fear of strangers knocking on the door, over think everything and I'm generally not the same person anymore. I used to be very happy with myself, loved fashion and hair and make up and was approaching my 50s ( 53 now) with a zest for life. That all came tumbling down!. It's coming back but yeah just not the same. I also don't see the point of horizon on a personal level for my OH. When I've read up about it it seems it's all about addressing low self esteem, getting back into work ( he works full time) having a healthy relationship ( he does) etc etc. another aspect of the course does seem to address them having empathy with victims ( my OH was possession of IIOC) and trying to understand why they got there and having a better usage a of the internet. He has really worked on himself to address what he's done. It feels like it would of been more beneficial straight after the knock?

Posted Tue April 15, 2025 2:49pmReport post

Smile through tears

Member since
September 2021

2711 posts

My son has just completed 'Becoming new me' course, he served four years before it was offered.

Once he'd formed a trusting relationship with his therapist it opened up his life, he discussed anxieties he felt as a child and growing up. His insecurities and how he found himself committing the crime. Harder sessions involved discussing guilt and the family repercussions of his actions.

It also involved discussing certain situations he might come across and how to deal with his thoughts in a different way.

The results were so positive and he received a glowing report - felt so proud of him.

i think these courses are well worth going for!

Posted Tue April 15, 2025 3:50pm
Edited Tue April 15, 2025 4:11pmReport post

Louise49

Member since
January 2021

501 posts

So my OH has spoken to the probation officer for the course who will do his 1 to 1 and it's not the horizon course . It's called Building Choices? I've not heard of it but it will be be twice weekly sessions in a group so I'm guessing all types of offenders not just sex offenders

Posted Tue April 15, 2025 6:34pmReport post

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