Family and Friends Forum

I have no advice but couldn't read and run

I don't know how I will feel when our time comes but if impending bail dates are anything to go by I'll be a complete wreck.

Sending you huge virtual hugs and support xxxx

I wish I could offer some great words of advice but I can't. Hang in there, you've got this far. I hope your migraine eases off soon. They make hard things even harder. Try and be kind to yourself over the next however many days you have before sentencing. Xx

Hi, I was in this situation only last month.

I wanted the entire situation over and to allow us to heal and move forward with our new lives I knew that meant the day in court had to be achieved.

When my sons original sentencing date came and went due to not being listed the evening before I was really irritated. I felt like something wanted to hold us there where we couldn't live.

As soon as sentencing was confirmed, my son left the dock and the court room I felt the enormous stress leave. We knew the press were present and expected the reporting. We held our breath the following day and agreed the vile comments online were from people how really didn't know. It was very clear some had read the headline too and not even the sentence!

I don't not want to imply it was easy, I paced the floor outside the court room, however please believe in your inner strength and that you can begin to heal and live.

All the very best xx

I honestly don't know. But know that you're not alone x

Rewind and remind yourself all the problems that have occurred since the beginning of your journey and how you HAVE coped and shuffled forward.

It's a nasty stage but you will get through - once over you will know what lies ahead with a clearer head....

Bless you and a hug sent x

My ex is due to be sentenced next week but it's been adjourned FOUR times so far, literally the night before. I just want it over. For me, it's an intolerable stress but I do need this to be over. X

We're almost four weeks post sentencing. The days running up to it were stressful but it does all seem like a distant memory now. I just tried to keep myself busy. There are of course different challenges now regarding SHPO and SOR but these will just have to be dealt with. On the day of sentencing my person was getting the train as I don't drive and he couldn't in case he got a custodial. The trains were delayed because of a problem. He didn't take his phone either so I had to get to the station and say if they were delayed too long I'd got my friend on standby to take him. Luckily it was all ok. A stressful start to the morning but I can smile about it now :)

You will get through it. Sending a hug x

I have looked forward to the sentencing and saw it as a point where we can start moving forward from. It helped me, for us to plan for the worst case scenario and just be as best prepared as possible. The day is now a blur.

We got through the lead up to sentencing by concentrating on all the practical things my person needed to put in place in case he went to prison. There was the bank account, insurance, mobile phone contract etc to think about, we shopped for the things he needed to pack in his 'just in case' bag. There were decisions made on how his children would be told and the support their mum would need if he was no longer around to share child care.

The unknown is so difficult but for us preparing for the worst did help to give us a small sense of being in control.

Excellent advice Ocean, one thing I wish we'd have done, I hid my head in the sand as we knew my son would go to prison. We didn't prepare a thing.

Sorting what he left was another unbelievable heartbreaking stress which of course he couldn't 'do' anything as he wasn't there!!!!

again - good advice...