Still in love ?
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Might sound a daft question ladies but this is too all you ladies that have decided to stand by your husbands/partners . I'm sure you love them that's why you are still there but are any of yous still IN LOVE with them I feel there's a difference . Xx
Yes I am. It took me a while to figure things out and my partner knows if there was ever anything else we'd be over no matter how I feel. But yeah I can confirm I am crazy in love with my partner. And in a strange way even more so since all of this and I'm seeing the work he is putting in to better himself not just with this, but with other things too.
There's definitely a difference. I still love my ex, but from shortly after the first knock I knew I was no longer in love with him. X
Thanks for your input ladies so it obviously effects different people in different ways I'm not sure if how I feel could be also due to the menopause . I havnt been totally intimate with him in 3 years since the knock not sure if that's just me saying I have control or if it's due to the change . I do love him and he has completely changed how he treats me for the better x
MOLLYDOG
The reason it affects me differently is probably because my ex and I had been together for 30 years having had 4 children when the first knock came. The day after, he admitted to me that he'd had sexual feelings towards children from the age of 12/13. So I spent 30 years with a P, sharing a life, a bed, children. There's no therapy available that could rectify that. I clearly couldn't remain married to him. But our lives have been intertwined for a very long time and because I decided to "support" him including visiting him in prison, I lost my family and friends so after becoming very ill following the second knock (yes, he reoffended ), and needing care, he was the only one available to help me. The biggest mistake of my life was not walking away after the first knock. Any partners out there who's person reoffends, think very very hard that they're not a P, addicted to porn or not. X
The reason it affects me differently is probably because my ex and I had been together for 30 years having had 4 children when the first knock came. The day after, he admitted to me that he'd had sexual feelings towards children from the age of 12/13. So I spent 30 years with a P, sharing a life, a bed, children. There's no therapy available that could rectify that. I clearly couldn't remain married to him. But our lives have been intertwined for a very long time and because I decided to "support" him including visiting him in prison, I lost my family and friends so after becoming very ill following the second knock (yes, he reoffended ), and needing care, he was the only one available to help me. The biggest mistake of my life was not walking away after the first knock. Any partners out there who's person reoffends, think very very hard that they're not a P, addicted to porn or not. X
Hi Molly dog
i'm still trying to work out how I feel about my OH I still see him but I'm not sure if I'm in love with him or just love him unfortunately He still still really good to me and it makes it very difficult for me to figure out how I feel I think part of me still loves him but I do feel so so hurt and betrayed by what he's done. I lost everything when it came out that he had offended and that was before he met me and now to have him do it again it's really put my head in a spin at the moment. I'm just taking it one day at a time and see what happens when he goes to court!,
i'm still trying to work out how I feel about my OH I still see him but I'm not sure if I'm in love with him or just love him unfortunately He still still really good to me and it makes it very difficult for me to figure out how I feel I think part of me still loves him but I do feel so so hurt and betrayed by what he's done. I lost everything when it came out that he had offended and that was before he met me and now to have him do it again it's really put my head in a spin at the moment. I'm just taking it one day at a time and see what happens when he goes to court!,
My husband who I've been with for 36 years was raped at the age of 12 by a male teacher the ordeal lasted 12 months .He began to wonder if he was bisexual in his early 40s and started to take sexually to men on line unbeknown to me .we did split for a while when I found out but I pitied him after I found out what he had been through . We got over that then 3 years ago we got the knock he had been in chat groups with gay men again and someone in the group chat put iioc on . I've chose to stay as I do love him but that's why I'm unsure of being in love anymore . I don't want to live my life without him x
I have this fight in my head every single day. I have alot of love for him and i dont think that will ever go away. I cant answer if im still "in love" with him though. I feel terrible for him and how he ruined his life. I want him to be in my life and my childrens lives. Anything i go through on a daily basis i want to talk to him about bc hes my person. He is my comfort and security and days we spend with the kids without thinking about this hell of a journey we are on are my favorite days. However I also have so much anger and resentment towards him for what hes done to our family. I dont look at him the same as I did before. So I dont know what my feelings are truly. I suppose when this is all over and we make it to the other side I will be able to figure this out without the fear of court and jail lingering over my mind constantly.
@letitgo that is exactly how I feel about my OH, I mean exactly the same. I adore him but when that knock happened something shifted in the way I think about him.
I think until we are out the other side of the legal process and poss media, I can't think straight. He certainly needs me now, and I do love him a lot, but what will our relationship look like after all of this is anyones guess. I haven't even seen the charge sheet as there isn't one yet. It's been a long 3 years of feeling like this, in limbo.
Difficult isn't it?.......
I think until we are out the other side of the legal process and poss media, I can't think straight. He certainly needs me now, and I do love him a lot, but what will our relationship look like after all of this is anyones guess. I haven't even seen the charge sheet as there isn't one yet. It's been a long 3 years of feeling like this, in limbo.
Difficult isn't it?.......
We are out the other side I just want things to go back to they whether 20 odd years ago x
I'm honestly not sure I am. I can't bear him touching me and I'll never be able to forgive him for taking away my chance of having a family or a normal life. He's literally destroyed everything we worked on together... and I guess at the end of the day, porn and being a toxic male was more important to him than I ever was :(
Honestly for me resentment has massively taken over. I feel sad that OH has missed out on the bond he should have with our baby, he didn't get to meet her until she was a couple of months old. Supervised contact has to be away from my home when my 16yr old (previous relationship )is home(he's a home body). sometimes I feel a pressure to make time when I'm really not in the best place for it. Baby obviously isn't able to settle with dad which is hard to see but he ultimately caused this.
I do honestly wonder, whatever the outcome of the investigation. Will I ever feel the same.
I do honestly wonder, whatever the outcome of the investigation. Will I ever feel the same.
Hopefully in time we all might beable to get back to where we were years ago thanks again for your truthful replies ladies
I thought I loved my partner and let him stay for almost 12 months after the knock. We had been together over 30 years. Other stuff came out that made me question that live and our relationship. Does a man who says he has a porn addiction and was watching it whilst I was in the house actually love me? How disrespectful is that act of watching that stuff towards me? Slowly the scales fell.crom.my eyes and I saw what a liar and manipulative man he was.
Glad I got out.
Still got to get divorced but now when I see him I feel absolutely nothing towards him.
Maybe if the knock hadn't happened we would still be together. Who knows.
But I do know that I am finally managing to move on - and feel it's the right decision
Glad I got out.
Still got to get divorced but now when I see him I feel absolutely nothing towards him.
Maybe if the knock hadn't happened we would still be together. Who knows.
But I do know that I am finally managing to move on - and feel it's the right decision