There really is no light at the end of the tunnel.
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Wow, where to start.
Partner has a community order for two years, unpaid work for 200 hours - Sexual harm prevention order and signed the register for five years.
At court we had no media in there and really thought we were incredibly lucky, of course not.
Unfortunately, days later BAM it's in the local paper with our street name.
His work found out (he is an accountant) and are speaking with HR whether or not to keep him within the company as they are looking towards it damaging their reputation.
Then, couple nights back we had our car smashed in.
We want to move, we have a 3 year old daughter and this is ruining our lives but if he loses his job how can we move? The next company to hire him only need a simple google search and he's rejected.
I don't know what to do and feel our lives are just ruined.
Partner has a community order for two years, unpaid work for 200 hours - Sexual harm prevention order and signed the register for five years.
At court we had no media in there and really thought we were incredibly lucky, of course not.
Unfortunately, days later BAM it's in the local paper with our street name.
His work found out (he is an accountant) and are speaking with HR whether or not to keep him within the company as they are looking towards it damaging their reputation.
Then, couple nights back we had our car smashed in.
We want to move, we have a 3 year old daughter and this is ruining our lives but if he loses his job how can we move? The next company to hire him only need a simple google search and he's rejected.
I don't know what to do and feel our lives are just ruined.
So sorry to read that it feels like things are getting worse and worse for you.
The media aspect is really very frightening and unfortunately as you say, available for all to see. My partner's case was reported extensively following a police press release and the comments on social media were very difficult to deal with. I am sorry that you have been subjected to criminal damage too - do you think it was related or coincidental? hopefully that was reported to the police? If you feel unsafe in your home that will be something that the police need to take seriously. Especially with a small child.
I can completely appreciate that the uncertainty around work and the shock from the media reporting may feel unsurmountable.
I hope you don't think I am trying to minimise your situation because I can completely understand the pain, torment and confusion that these situations create but I read a few positives in your situation and perhaps these are things worth focusing on rather than on things you can't control? It's great that your OH is at home and not in prison. Small mercy I know but a mercy nonetheless. Five years on SOR feels long now but I am sure it will be over before you know it and if he has no significant SHPO restrictions then by and large, you can lead a relatively normal life. The media attention will calm down and eventually you will be able to request for links on Google to be taken down. With regards to work, would you OH feel able to start his own business? Accountancy is a great profession for that!
In the midst of the unknown, it is very difficult to see the light, but with time, you will definitely see it too and you will find a way to move forwards. Just think of how far you have come and everything you have survived already...this too shall pass xx
The media aspect is really very frightening and unfortunately as you say, available for all to see. My partner's case was reported extensively following a police press release and the comments on social media were very difficult to deal with. I am sorry that you have been subjected to criminal damage too - do you think it was related or coincidental? hopefully that was reported to the police? If you feel unsafe in your home that will be something that the police need to take seriously. Especially with a small child.
I can completely appreciate that the uncertainty around work and the shock from the media reporting may feel unsurmountable.
I hope you don't think I am trying to minimise your situation because I can completely understand the pain, torment and confusion that these situations create but I read a few positives in your situation and perhaps these are things worth focusing on rather than on things you can't control? It's great that your OH is at home and not in prison. Small mercy I know but a mercy nonetheless. Five years on SOR feels long now but I am sure it will be over before you know it and if he has no significant SHPO restrictions then by and large, you can lead a relatively normal life. The media attention will calm down and eventually you will be able to request for links on Google to be taken down. With regards to work, would you OH feel able to start his own business? Accountancy is a great profession for that!
In the midst of the unknown, it is very difficult to see the light, but with time, you will definitely see it too and you will find a way to move forwards. Just think of how far you have come and everything you have survived already...this too shall pass xx
I wish you could see that there will be light at the end of the tunnel. The tunnel might not lead to the future you imagined or wanted, but that has been turned upside down by no fault of your own and you and your daughter should not have to suffer the consequences of the actions of others.
Make your daughter the priority and focus on the two of you. Make her life as calm, happy and as easy as it can be.
Do you have family and friends you can stay with? Take yourselves our of his situation, give him time to sort himself out and you focus on getting yourself strong for your little one. The light will come back I promise.
Make your daughter the priority and focus on the two of you. Make her life as calm, happy and as easy as it can be.
Do you have family and friends you can stay with? Take yourselves our of his situation, give him time to sort himself out and you focus on getting yourself strong for your little one. The light will come back I promise.