Social services in no hurry
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Back in December my children were put on a child protection plan. My original social worker was just horrendous and there was so many lies in her report about things me or my partner had said, but it was her word against ours. They decided I'd need a parenting assessment and that started in December. We then got a new social worker at the beginning of March. We go back to conference next week and today I received her report and how the children will be staying on a child protection plan because not enough work has been done but literally I'm still waiting for them to complete my assessment and there's nothing I can do until they've done it. I've completed the inform course and I've done the nspcc safe guarding course. I have asked if there's anything else I can do and they tell me just to wait until my assessment is done but they're just in no rush to do it and it's really annoying me. I really don't want to atend the meeting next week because I'm sick of sitting round a table. Everyone talking about how terrible my partner is and then saying how I'm a terrible mum for staying with him and I csmt protect my children and then nothing changes. Almost 8 months into this with them and nothing has changed. I just want to be able to supervise the contact between my partner and children.
I'm not sure what the point of this is. Just a rant maybe some advice but it helps to get it all off of my chest.
I'm not sure what the point of this is. Just a rant maybe some advice but it helps to get it all off of my chest.
What did your parenting assessment involve if you don't mind me asking?
What are the opinions of the IRO?- they should be pulling the SW up for not doing things in a timely manner. Its really impoertant that you attend just to air your views, if your not happy then say so and make sure its minuted.
They did nothing for me for 9 months on a CPP and now have escalated it to PLO because they can. They are absolutely abysmal in how they operate and I'm surprised they dont appear in the media more about how they treat families.
What are the opinions of the IRO?- they should be pulling the SW up for not doing things in a timely manner. Its really impoertant that you attend just to air your views, if your not happy then say so and make sure its minuted.
They did nothing for me for 9 months on a CPP and now have escalated it to PLO because they can. They are absolutely abysmal in how they operate and I'm surprised they dont appear in the media more about how they treat families.
So far it was just speaking about my childhood and then a questionnaire to see if I understand what sexual abuse is.. that's all that's been done. It seems like it's never coming to an end.
What is an iro?
We've followed the plan to a T. We've done everything they have asked and there's nothing else we can do except wait for them to do their part and it's so infuriating.
What is plo?
What is an iro?
We've followed the plan to a T. We've done everything they have asked and there's nothing else we can do except wait for them to do their part and it's so infuriating.
What is plo?
Hello,
I'm so sorry you're still not progressing with a new social worker, I've been reading your updates on the forum and always felt for you when you've discussed having to go to the meetings and feeling very much like everyone is out to criticise you.
I hope you go to the meeting next week if only to prove you're still there and still invested in working with them even if they haven't kept momentum with your assessment.
I was also wondering which NSPCC safeguarding course you did? I kept looking but could only find ones for professionals!
Best of luck to both of you with your meetings.
I'm so sorry you're still not progressing with a new social worker, I've been reading your updates on the forum and always felt for you when you've discussed having to go to the meetings and feeling very much like everyone is out to criticise you.
I hope you go to the meeting next week if only to prove you're still there and still invested in working with them even if they haven't kept momentum with your assessment.
I was also wondering which NSPCC safeguarding course you did? I kept looking but could only find ones for professionals!
Best of luck to both of you with your meetings.
Thankyiu, the thing is genuinely I really like my new social worker she's lovely and very to the point when it comes to what she expects and I really like that about her. It just infuriates me that as you said we aren't progressing. I try to explain to her how hard it is to sit around a table full of people telling me how much of a terrible person my partner is and then telling me how I'm just as bad for sticking by him. It's just infuriating not being listened too.
Yeah I suppose that is one way of looking at the meeting. I'm seeing my social worker tomorrow I'm going to talk to her and get these things off of my chest and hopefully I'll feel better.
I found it on their website there's an option to do it online anx you just buy one course of it for £30 I believe it was and then I completed it all online.
Yeah I suppose that is one way of looking at the meeting. I'm seeing my social worker tomorrow I'm going to talk to her and get these things off of my chest and hopefully I'll feel better.
I found it on their website there's an option to do it online anx you just buy one course of it for £30 I believe it was and then I completed it all online.
Hi marader,
The IRO is the Independent Reviewing Officer who presides over the meetings. Her (or his) job is to make sure things are run fairly and in the best interests of the child and to intervene if the meeeting gets heated or difficult. Ultimately she/he decides at the end (after all the professionals have given a score about how high in their opinion the risk is) what the outcome will be eg continue on CP, de-escalate etc.
The IRO should have a chat with you before the meeting and this would be where you can express your frustration and complain about how things haven't been done in a timely fashion. They are separate from all the team involved in your case and should be a non partial participant. I hope you have had this opportunity for a chat before other meetings because if not they haven't carried out their duties correctly.
The IRO is the Independent Reviewing Officer who presides over the meetings. Her (or his) job is to make sure things are run fairly and in the best interests of the child and to intervene if the meeeting gets heated or difficult. Ultimately she/he decides at the end (after all the professionals have given a score about how high in their opinion the risk is) what the outcome will be eg continue on CP, de-escalate etc.
The IRO should have a chat with you before the meeting and this would be where you can express your frustration and complain about how things haven't been done in a timely fashion. They are separate from all the team involved in your case and should be a non partial participant. I hope you have had this opportunity for a chat before other meetings because if not they haven't carried out their duties correctly.
IRO= independent review officer= the person who chairs the conferences. She is supposed to be independent of the SW and takes a balanced view on everything. She has all the power, she can decide what happens, stay on CPP, escalate or move down to CIN. Even though my OH's probabtion officer supports the move to CIN, the chair disagrees and keeps the CPP in place.
PLO is one step before court. You have to go to a meeting with your solicitor and theirs, they outline their concerns and what needs to change. It's escalated for us because it's the only way they could fund specialist assessments, they wouldn't fund it while on CPP.
PLO is one step before court. You have to go to a meeting with your solicitor and theirs, they outline their concerns and what needs to change. It's escalated for us because it's the only way they could fund specialist assessments, they wouldn't fund it while on CPP.
OOps double posting about the IRO. Sorry!
Every conference we've had rhe chair has said 'we was going to have a chat before the meeting started but we don't have time' I assume that's the iro? I've decided I'm going to tell them if they want me to attend I will attend on teams. I don't have anyone to look after my children and I'm definitely not taking them with me given my previous experiences in these meetings.
Ahh OK that makes sense. Well I hope it all works out well for you!
Ahh OK that makes sense. Well I hope it all works out well for you!
Also noone has given a score in previous meetings the chair has just asked if everyone agrees that the threshold for them to be concerned the children are subject to harm is met and everyone's just said yes. I've also not received any minutes or anything from the conferences.
The chair should speak to you separately before the conference starts. I'm sure they have to do that to be able to express your views
Noone has so far and we've had 2 conferences. Every meeting I've been too before we go In I get told they don't have time
Hey,
hate to say but I know EXACTLY how you feel, SS have been the bane of my life for over 2 years now, it's been nearly a year since my OH was sentenced and we're STILL in the same boat and they couldn't care less about dragging their heels. Both me and my OH had assessments back in march and we're still bloody waiting for the results. It's gotten so ridiculous now that I've finally put in a formal complaint which atm still hasn't gotten me very far and if nothing is done before our 4/5th conference (I honestly gave up counting) then I'll be escalating it even further.
I've never been able to supervise contact either and going by the assessor's comments I won't ever be allowed to despite her talking so highly about me in the reports it was such a stab in the back and I've made every professional know that I'm not happy and tbh I don't think they (except SS) were happy about it either.
You should really be getting a chat before each conference, and if they say they haven't got the time then it's not good enough, although admittedly I swear most of the time they have their decision before they've even walked through the door, that's been my experience anyway.
Here to chat if you ever want to rant x
hate to say but I know EXACTLY how you feel, SS have been the bane of my life for over 2 years now, it's been nearly a year since my OH was sentenced and we're STILL in the same boat and they couldn't care less about dragging their heels. Both me and my OH had assessments back in march and we're still bloody waiting for the results. It's gotten so ridiculous now that I've finally put in a formal complaint which atm still hasn't gotten me very far and if nothing is done before our 4/5th conference (I honestly gave up counting) then I'll be escalating it even further.
I've never been able to supervise contact either and going by the assessor's comments I won't ever be allowed to despite her talking so highly about me in the reports it was such a stab in the back and I've made every professional know that I'm not happy and tbh I don't think they (except SS) were happy about it either.
You should really be getting a chat before each conference, and if they say they haven't got the time then it's not good enough, although admittedly I swear most of the time they have their decision before they've even walked through the door, that's been my experience anyway.
Here to chat if you ever want to rant x
You can't complain to Ofsted but I have emailed them giving them feedback on how the local authority have handled the case. I'm about to escalate my complaint to stage 3, I'm absolutely fed up with them. They will not acknowledge that they have done things wrong at the beginning. When daughter was classed as a CIN, they did no written agreement with us, didn't explain what supervised contact was and then everything snowballed from there.
So today was the conference. I couldn't attend because both the babies are unwell. Thursday night I ended up in hospital with my 6 week old. Anyway, last week the chair phoned and I said how I was getting frustrated with how long everything seems to be taking, my parenting assessment which was started in December still isn't done, I've done my courses my partners on his and said I just want to be able to supervise him and the babies purely so iy makes things easier. We're relying on his sister at the moment and they live over an hour away. Anyway they have said again that because I mentioned me supervising I'm prioritising that over my children and I'm getting real fed up of them saying that. Does anyone have any ideas what I can say or do to make them understand I am doing every single thing they ask of us. My children have always and will always come first. But considering 8 months ago I was able to supervise and then they changed their minds overnight?! For no reason at all. I don't think me now asking when I can is unreasonable. Someone tell me if I'm wrong please I'm losing my mind
Children services are suposed to help keep families together as much as possible. Have they said the reason why they will not allow you to supervise contact? Was the conference not cancelled if you could not attend? Did the father go to the conference?
It sounds like they are not being very clear or transparent. Have you thought about submitting a complaint? It sounds like you need a new conference chair
It sounds like they are not being very clear or transparent. Have you thought about submitting a complaint? It sounds like you need a new conference chair
Unfortunately that doesnt seem to be the case in these situations... Just because I've not done my parenting assessment, but I hadn't had one done before and I was allowed to supervise...
My ex did (father too my older children) babies dad didn't as his probation officer wasn't going, neither was his visor manager and he's had a bad experience with social twisting his words he said he wasn't in the right frame of mind to put himself in a situation that could happen again and jeopardise all the work hes been putting in. I haven't because our last conference went well, by well I mean she just wasn't nasty to me. Then on the phone the other day she seemed to understand my frustrations about things taking so long. If what my ex said is true then she just took everything the wrong way I'm not sure what to do
My ex did (father too my older children) babies dad didn't as his probation officer wasn't going, neither was his visor manager and he's had a bad experience with social twisting his words he said he wasn't in the right frame of mind to put himself in a situation that could happen again and jeopardise all the work hes been putting in. I haven't because our last conference went well, by well I mean she just wasn't nasty to me. Then on the phone the other day she seemed to understand my frustrations about things taking so long. If what my ex said is true then she just took everything the wrong way I'm not sure what to do