My ex- children's dad.
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So we're finally getting somewhere with social services!!!! She is writing up her recomendations on how to move forward and we should hear by the end of the week. She has agreed that waiting for him to complete ihorizon before he comes home knowing that there's still stleast an 8 month waiting list is unrealistic and he should- all going as planned. SHOULD. be home by then. I probably shouldn't get my hopes up but it's waaaaay to late haha.
Anyway, now my issue is my older children's father. He is now saying that he doesn't want my older 2 too have anything to do with him, ever. My older 2 miss him dearly and ask for him home evey single day. My daughter has cried herself to sleep many nights because she misses him. They have both repeatedly told the school and social services how much they miss him and they have both Said the right thing to do is start allowing contact soon so not to effect they're emotional wellbeing but social services have Said dad has to agree it. Dad has always had an issue with alcohol however not to the extent it is at the moment and I'm hearing from so many people how bad his drinking is and apparently he is now taking drugs however I don't have proof of this. Every time I try and talk to my ex it just turns into an argument. Both the school and social services have said they feel this is less about his 'need to protect' the children and more about his feelings towards me. He literally text me the other day and asked why I'm with my partner and not him. He has also asked my partner for money on multiple occasions, offered my partner a job and on many occasions said that I should just let my partner see the children without social services knowing (obviously I haven't done that) My question is can social services over ride his wishes on him not seeing the children? What will happen if I do. We're both the children's parents surely his wishes don't matter more than mine? Especially when he's as unstable as he is currently. I'm going to mention I have tried to help him but he's the kind of person who enjoys all the sympathy from being sad and crying about how much he needs help. I just want to know if anyone has been through anything similar and can possibly give me some advice? I just want my family back and knowing iy could be my drunk ex who stops that from happening when me and my partner have been through so much. And done so much just angers me. Also just to chuck in, my ex has a new girlfriend every couple of weeks and is introducing the kids to them constantly. I'm not sure if that matters.
Anyway, now my issue is my older children's father. He is now saying that he doesn't want my older 2 too have anything to do with him, ever. My older 2 miss him dearly and ask for him home evey single day. My daughter has cried herself to sleep many nights because she misses him. They have both repeatedly told the school and social services how much they miss him and they have both Said the right thing to do is start allowing contact soon so not to effect they're emotional wellbeing but social services have Said dad has to agree it. Dad has always had an issue with alcohol however not to the extent it is at the moment and I'm hearing from so many people how bad his drinking is and apparently he is now taking drugs however I don't have proof of this. Every time I try and talk to my ex it just turns into an argument. Both the school and social services have said they feel this is less about his 'need to protect' the children and more about his feelings towards me. He literally text me the other day and asked why I'm with my partner and not him. He has also asked my partner for money on multiple occasions, offered my partner a job and on many occasions said that I should just let my partner see the children without social services knowing (obviously I haven't done that) My question is can social services over ride his wishes on him not seeing the children? What will happen if I do. We're both the children's parents surely his wishes don't matter more than mine? Especially when he's as unstable as he is currently. I'm going to mention I have tried to help him but he's the kind of person who enjoys all the sympathy from being sad and crying about how much he needs help. I just want to know if anyone has been through anything similar and can possibly give me some advice? I just want my family back and knowing iy could be my drunk ex who stops that from happening when me and my partner have been through so much. And done so much just angers me. Also just to chuck in, my ex has a new girlfriend every couple of weeks and is introducing the kids to them constantly. I'm not sure if that matters.
Your ex will not be aloud to stop it. It will be risk assessed with social services and doccumented well. If he doesn't agree he will have to take you to family court to contest this from what you've explained he will not get very far at all! You just continue working with social services for a plan which suites you guys and let him do him x
Is that right? Social services have said they would need his permission for things to go ahead. I had thought of suggesting court because I've been googling things and Google basically said that a judge will probably not rule in his favour. Obviously if that can be avoided then I'd rather that. I had planned on texting him and just telling him enough is enough now im sick of his games and my partner is going to start having contact with the children again and if he had a problem with that then he could try his luck in court but I just don't want Social services to say I'm making things worse