Children's friends
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Social services first meeting yesterday. My partner does not live in the house but has supervised access to our children for 1.5 hrs for dinner. Social services have stated that the children are not allowed friends in the house. I stated that I 100% guarantee that he would not be here when they are, but they are having none of it. My kids are teens so have various friends over. Any advice? Can I challenge this?
Did they give their reasoning why? If he's not in the house where is the risk? Does your partner still live there? It may be that they're concerned with the practicalities of managing this; you can't keep turfing him out when people come over unexpectedly or they may be concerned about having to disclose to the kids parents or their reactions of you allowed them in the home without disclosing. However they are severely affecting your children's lives and childhood if they aren't allowed friends in the house.
This is my point.my husband is not currently living in the home he comes for an hour a day to see the kids. My son is 13 has been badly bullied at school. His mentla health was not good but is getting better as he has a lovley gf of 4 months and she comes at set times each Sat from like 1 to 5. I can ensure my husband is not here. Like how do I explain that she cant come each sat to her parents or to my son? When she has been for 4 months. It would have a detrimental effect on him. My daughters friends also come at arranged times so I dont see the issue. Are they trying to say I am a problem. If I am safe with my kids in the house and my husband ie the risk has been removed, what is the issue? They threatened to tell my sons gf mother if I let her in the house the whole story. I dont know how to challenge this? I think a face to face appointment with the social worker manager? At a loss....
This is what makes my blood boil about SS. They can impose restrictions on your life with no consideration of the impact of it, on you or your children. Xx
I feel they dont believe me and are calling me a liar and that I will not follow their rules. I feel they want me to put in windows my husband is under investigation for iioc. He has not even be questioned or charged. Devices lifted. Like I thought they were out to protect kids but all I am feeling atm is they looking fwd to making their lives a living hell. Disgusted. They keep trying to put words in my mouth. Could seriously scream.
Be very wary of them. They have a reputation for twisting things and treating opinions as facts. I've had an awful experience with them xx
It seems from our own experienece that whilst things are still under investigation so there could be other offences discovered in due course, the standard view is to be harsh 'just in case' there is a real danger to children in the home, as yet undiscovered. It comes under the definition of 'risk', however unlikely. It's to cover Social Services backs until such time as everything is in the open - so the opposite of innocent until proven guilty. Do I think it's fair? Of course not, especially as not all cases seem to follow this way of thinking, according to some posts on here.
My OH committed his offence in August 2023- he has been charged with obscene publications 1959. He was charged in June 2024 and bail conditions were lifted. He isn't on the SOR or been given a SHPO. Yet SS have escalated us to PLO, they ignored a detailed report from his StopSo therapist. SS will not let him live at the house, he hasn't been allowed to live at the house since August 2023. That was due to bail conditions and when they were lifted in June 2024 and SS got back in contact they then wouldn't let him live at the house. His offence didn't involve any images and the police have openly said what he did wasn't a sexual crime in the eyes of the law.
Yet here we are being threatened with court action xx
Yet here we are being threatened with court action xx