Processing the News and Can I Continue?
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Hi,
This is all very fresh for me, my partner went on a family trip and on return to australia was detained and is now on bail re the possiession of child pornography.
This has been very shocking and diffcult to process and im having very conflicting feelings.
This doesnt align with the person i know.
He states it was due to the taboo and he was in the process of stopping prior to the return on the trip.
At the end of the day im never going to fully know if its true or he just got caught.
His family and friends are sticking by him.
I know there is so many questions to ask and dig in to know the full extent and if i can guage a future pending the trial.
I guess it would be great to hear both sides about staying or going. If staying is an option and what that can look like.
I do believe him and i do know this doesnt align but it still happened.
I am in therapy trying to process all my emotions.
I feel like i cant give anyone straight answers right now as it feels like i and viewing him and what he did separetly as i process.
Thanks.
This is all very fresh for me, my partner went on a family trip and on return to australia was detained and is now on bail re the possiession of child pornography.
This has been very shocking and diffcult to process and im having very conflicting feelings.
This doesnt align with the person i know.
He states it was due to the taboo and he was in the process of stopping prior to the return on the trip.
At the end of the day im never going to fully know if its true or he just got caught.
His family and friends are sticking by him.
I know there is so many questions to ask and dig in to know the full extent and if i can guage a future pending the trial.
I guess it would be great to hear both sides about staying or going. If staying is an option and what that can look like.
I do believe him and i do know this doesnt align but it still happened.
I am in therapy trying to process all my emotions.
I feel like i cant give anyone straight answers right now as it feels like i and viewing him and what he did separetly as i process.
Thanks.
Hey, sorry you find yourself here. If this is all very new to you then probably the first thing is take a breath and dont rush into any decisions just yet. Its probably not what you want to hear but this tends to be a long process. My ex was arrested in June 2024 and sentencing with a guilty plea is this Thursday. Thats actually quick compared to how long some have waited. I chose to support him but as of a month ago when his plea hearing was I realised I could no longer be with him. I was told it was a misunderstanding, he'd been hacked etc. But I just couldnt fully trust what he was telling me and you cant have a relationship with no trust! Its sad. I thought id stay but I lost friends because of it also and honestly its so hard. I dont have children, so those with children I take my hat of to because I dont know how they do it. Noone can tell you stay or leave. But this site is great for information and based on what I read i felt I made an informed decision about how life would be going forward. I hope everything works out for you either way!
I have decided to stay with my husband. He was arrested at work 4 days before christmas. They knocked on our door and I was so confused, I honestly thought he had died because I couldn't imagine my husband ever doing anything illegal.
He has been accused of possession and distribution of IIOCs with no communication or contact offenses.
I decided because of who he was I would give him a second chance, it took quiet a long time for me to process it all though. Discussing the why helped me confirm that I'd stay.
It's not been easy because we have a 1 year old and the SS until recently where driving me nuts!! But I got used to the bail terms quickly
He has been accused of possession and distribution of IIOCs with no communication or contact offenses.
I decided because of who he was I would give him a second chance, it took quiet a long time for me to process it all though. Discussing the why helped me confirm that I'd stay.
It's not been easy because we have a 1 year old and the SS until recently where driving me nuts!! But I got used to the bail terms quickly