Family and Friends Forum

Post-Traumatic Stress

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Lucy from Stop it Now!

Member since
September 2018

640 posts

Dear Forum Users,

‘The knock’ is not just a police visit, it can also be the beginning of significant trauma. When someone close to us is put under investigation or have been arrested for online sexual offences towards children, the shock can be overwhelming. Many individuals describe feeling like their world has collapsed. Even after the police leave, the emotional impact can linger for days, weeks or even years.

A report conducted by Armitage et al. (2021) in collaboration with the Lucy Faithfull Foundation, showed that 72% of the respondents reported Post-Traumatic Symptom Stress Symptoms (PTSS) levels that indicate they would likely meet the threshold for a possible diagnosis of PTSD. The participants had different relationships to the person who’d been arrested for online sexual offences towards children but had all experienced the impact of ‘the knock’. The Faithfull Papers, available on our website, published ‘The indirect harm of online child sexual abuse: the impact on families of people who offend’ in 2023, where the report is summarised.

It is important that if you experience symptoms of PTSD, you receive the support you need and deserve. Some common symptoms of PTSD after ‘the knock’ can include:

1. Intrusive Thoughts and Flashbacks
You might replay the moment over and over — the sound of the knock or the doorbell ringing, or the look on their face. These memories can feel vivid and uncontrollable.

2. Hypervigilance and Anxiety
You may feel constantly on edge, like danger is around every corner. Loud noises, unexpected visitors, or even certain times of day might trigger panic.

3. Emotional Numbness or Detachment
Some people feel disconnected from their emotions, their surroundings, or even their loved ones. It’s a way the brain tries to protect itself.

4. Sleep Disturbances
Nightmares, insomnia, or waking in a panic are common. Your body may struggle to feel safe enough to rest.

5. Avoidance
You might avoid talking about what happened, seeing certain people, or going places that remind you of the event. Even thinking about the future can feel unbearable.

6. Guilt or Shame
You may feel responsible, even though you’re not. You might question whether you missed signs or feel ashamed of being connected to the person who offended.

If you experience any of these symptoms, we encourage you to seek some professional advice and support. Please take good care of yourself and know that you are not alone.


Kind regards,

The Forum Team

Posted Mon September 29, 2025 1:37pm
Edited by moderator Mon September 29, 2025 2:01pmReport post

Ajustcopingparent

Member since
August 2024

199 posts

I think my 17yr old son is suffering PTSD but tried to get him support via camhs but they told us to go to nhs talking therapy who from personal experience are a waste of space. Seems no one wants to support.

Posted Fri October 3, 2025 10:08pmReport post

edel2020

Member since
March 2022

634 posts

The charity sector can be very helpful. Try contacting MIND or one of the online organisations.

Posted Sat October 4, 2025 10:39amReport post

26a20

Member since
December 2024

242 posts

Talking therapy tends to act as a gateway to accessing other forms of therapy, at least thats how it was explained when I did it back in April. They can suggest further treatment such as CBT, DBT etc but you have to have completed a course of talking therapy first.

Posted Tue October 7, 2025 6:41amReport post

Sofia12

Member since
July 2023

11 posts

I am not surprised at all about the recent research into family members. My son got the knock nearly 2 years ago and I don;t think my life will ever be the same again. I am still so anxious even though we are through the other end, as far as we can be re conviction etc.

I could answer yes to all the symptoms of ptsd and it is so hard to get help these days.

It has been helpful reading this though - and acknowledging that this is what it may well be.

Thank you for the support.

Posted Tue December 2, 2025 3:24pmReport post

Winnie07

Member since
April 2022

158 posts

I waited 2 mths for talking therapies to even acknowledge my referral, another month to be allocated someone who suggested online therapy. After review was advised counselling most appropriate, however not available on NHS. Total waste of time really as just couldn't face the trauma of discussing the whole thing yet again with another total stranger

Posted Wed December 3, 2025 10:13amReport post

Quick exit